Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer
by Verona Sage
Summary: My name is Jack Mercer, but before that I was someone else completely. Before I was just another kid, another lost cause and this is my story. I'll tell you everything. My loss, my love, my pain, all that's happened to me, and how I came to be a Mercer.
1. Chapter 1

Authors Note: Hey everybody. I'm starting this out from the film's deleted scene "The Brothers Eulogy." I don't own anything, all the character belong to the film. This is my first fanfiction so take it easy on me. I would to hear from all of you!

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

Prologue

It was a dark and dreary day. It seemed even the weather was affected by the loss of Evelyn Mercer, my mother. A large group of people silently stood around the coffin with their heads hanging low. It's such a shame to lose the most kind-hearted woman to have ever have lived in Detroit. I felt a few tears touch my cheek as the realization of my loss began to sink in harder. I barely heard Jerry saying his last few words for mom when he called my name. I sighed as I slowly walked towards the podium trying my best to hold my emotions in.

"I never bothered looking for my real parents, because to me…Evelyn was enough. I went from foster house to foster house but these people don't want you. They're just looking for some extra money and I remember them giving me hardly anything to eat. So you learn to take what you can get. When Evelyn took me in it was no different for me, till she caught me with my pockets all full and she tried to explain to me what it meant to be adopted, what it meant to have a family, what it meant to have a last name." I couldn't contain myself, the tears began to overflow and at that point I didn't really care. I had just lost the only woman that had actually cared for me, not as just another foster kid or another lost cause but a son, a real son. "And she would say Jackie, there's no reason to steal your own toothbrush anymore…because…" I felt Bobby put a comforting hand on my back. "Because I would take it and… I would put in my sock drawer…" I couldn't continue, it was too hard and I soon felt myself moving back to where I was standing before as Bobby took the podium.

"You know ma was never really big on goodbyes so…thank you all for coming. God bless you all." As people started to drift away I remained standing staring at the coffin that held my mother, tears streaming down my face. She was gone. The woman that took me in, believed in me, cared for me, worried for me, fed me, sheltered me…she was actually gone. Has it already been ten years since I first looked upon her sweet face? I remember coming to her when I was 14 years old, beaten up and completely uninterested in life. I'm 23 now, has it really been that long…I could still remember it like it was yesterday.

Authors Note: I know short, but it is a prologue. First chapter will be up in no time. No worries. But first...PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK, if i get it enough I'll totally continue on with this story. Hope you all liked it.

My name is Jack Mercer…it was Jack Bradshaw…and this is my story.


	2. Chapter 2

Authors Note: Hello, sorry for not being able to update. But I hope all of you like where the story is going. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave feedback. Believe it or not the readers do hold some sway over where this story leads. So please if you read this story, leave feedback for me.

Disclaimer: Don't own anybody or anything that has to do with Four Brothers

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer.

Chapter 2

"Jack RUN RUN!" I opened my eyes and saw Logan running towards me. The next thing I knew he had thrown my duffle bag at me and started running out of the room. I was completely disoriented having been woken up from my drunken stupor. Yes…declared alcoholic at the age fourteen. I grabbed my bag and rubbed my eyes as I tried to figure out what the hell was going on. It wasn't long before I heard the reason why Logan had run out on me.

"Everybody stay where you are. Detroit PD!" I immediately stood on my feet and went off into a sprint, suddenly awoken from my hangover. My heart was beating wildly, the creeping sense of panic permeated through my body, the police weren't far behind. No way I was going back there, no way were they going to put me back in that house, no way…I'd rather die. I ran through the hallways of the broken down motel, running as fast as I possibly could.

"Hey! FREEZE!" I looked over my shoulder and saw two policemen come around the corner. I could feel the acidic taste of vomit slowly make its way into my mouth, the fear of returning to my 'home' being unbearable at this point. Come on Jack, keep running, don't stop, just run. I stumbled down the five flights of stairs the echoes of the police footsteps not far behind. The exit sign was so close, it was within my grasp. I pushed open the door thinking I was completely free, only to be tackled down. I started wheezing, the breath completely knocked out of me, I could feel the cold snow slowly soak my thin sweater. I layed there in the snow with a burly cop on top of me holding me down, trying my best to breath. Suddenly a familiar face came into my field of vision.

"Not again Jack. I thought we had a serious talk about this." It was Green. I immediately began to struggle under the restraints of the cop holding me down.

"Let go of me! Let go!" I fought with all of my strength trying to push the police officer off of my body but my attempts were futile. I may have had a lot of height but I was still on the scrawny side. I was breathless and tired, in the end all I could do was lay there in the snow. Shaking from the cold or from the fear of what might happen to me, I wasn't too sure. Green bent down and grabbed me by the shoulders so I could stand up. He set me against the police car, I could've made a run for it but I knew I wouldn't make it that far. I stood there with unshed tears in my eyes feeling utterly helpless. Green just stood before me and shook his head as I watched more kids being filed out of the building in cuffs.

"What is it this time Jack? What do I have to get you for? Underage drinking? Illegal drug possession? Assault? Vandalism? Breaking and entering?" I looked down at my feet and mustered the little bit of fake courage I had left and cocked my head to the side.

"You want to put me in juvie again Green? Put me in juvie, at least they give me three meals a day." He glared at me as I looked him straight in the eye with a smirk on my face.

"You think you're so brave? What…you going to keep this up until you're eighteen so you can be put into a real jail with real criminals who don't give fuck about what they do to you?"

"And where the hell do you think I live? You think I live in a little piece of heaven? Believe me Green, my foster parents don't give a fuck about me either. At least in jail criminals will put me out of my misery instead of putting me through extensive torture." Suddenly a gleam of concern appeared in the young officer's eyes.

"What did they do to you Jack?" I stood silently. "Jack, what made you run away again." Another officer slowly made his way towards Green.

"Captain, we searched the building. Found a bag of marijuana, case of ecstasy, and a lot of alcohol." Green gave a heavy sigh. Busted…Green and the officer gazed at me. I shrugged my shoulders and gave a fake smile.

"What? Old habits die hard." I knew the police department knew who I was, I knew they hated me, more like an annoying small pest that wouldn't go away, and I would so often once in a while come knocking on their door with some other thing I did.

"Sir…shall I cuff him." Green nodded. The officer's grip around my arms was surprisingly strong and I winced when he came into contact with some very recent wounds. I closed my eyes as pain shot straight up through my arms. Green quickly took notice of my actions and stopped the officer from cuffing me.

"Hold on." I tried to turn away from Green's approach but it was done. I was caught in a corner. He grabbed my wrist and slowly pushed my sleeve upwards. Green's face contorted into a grimace slightly disgusted by what he saw. Some parts of my arm were completely bruised, coloring my usually pale complexion with a mix of green, yellow, and purple. Adding onto that, there were little dots of red from the cigarette buds that were, on many occasions, forced onto my skin, not to mention my own self-inflicted cuts down at my wrists. And that was only one arm. I looked down in complete shame. Not so tough now are you Jack, can't even protect yourself from that man that did this to you. Why the hell was I so damn pathetic.

"Call this boy an ambulance. He's going to need some medical attention." Green rolled down my sleeve and stood before me speechless.

Thirty minutes later.

With the building cleared out and all the squad cars full of delinquent children the busy day was almost over. I sat on edge of the back of the ambulance with a blanket over my shoulders. I watched the EMT who had been working on me walk towards Officer Green.

"How is he?"

"Not too good officer. He has countless large bruises on his entire body, multiple cigarette burns, some scarred skin on his back which I can only assume came from being beaten by a leather belt , not to mention the cuts on his wrists which I'm going to assume are self-inflicted, and I don't know for sure but I won't be surprised if we found a cracked rib if we did an X-Ray." I could suddenly feel the exhaustion of the past couple of days catch up to me. The pain my body was in, the uncertainty of my future, all of it started to eat away at me at that moment. The tears that I had been keeping locked away was about to force its way out and there was nothing I could do as silent tears started rolling down my cheeks.

Why do I have to be so weak, why couldn't I be stronger? The next thing I knew Green was sitting next to me in the ambulance with his hand on my shoulder. He knew. Most of the times I came off to be complete jackass to cops, arrogant and cocky to most, bad and a total lost cause to everybody else. But to Green, he knew it was just a façade, I had run into him one too many times for him not to know, that inside, I was scared. I was shaking all of the time from the inner core of my heart out of fear of what would become of me. I had never felt safe in my life, not once. I was always looking over my shoulder. You could never be too sure.

And now, I had nothing left. I was about to break, the tears continued to roll down my cheeks as I whispered under my breath, barely enough for Green to hear.

"Don't make me go back there…please don't make me go back there…please…please." Green gripped my shoulder at the sound of desperation in my voice and simply nodded his head.

Authors Note: So...what do you think? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave feedback. I know desperate, but hey...I'm a struggling writer. I need some source of inspiration.


	3. Chapter 3

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

Authors Note: Thank you so much for all of you who took time to leave feeback. And yes, the tough yet sensitive Jack is exactly what I was going for. Glad you caught that :). I'm not completely hopeless. So chapter 3 is up, hope all you like it.

Chapter 3

Green knocked on the door, the door that I was all too familiar to me. I silently stood by his side making sure that I had no remaining tears in my eyes. It was one thing to show Green that I could cry but it was another thing to show him I could cry. After several knocks the door slowly opened.

"I believe this is yours." Green stated looking at my social worker, Jerome Caldwell. He looked at me and sighed. Another god damn sigh, he was always so disappointed in me. Every time he dropped me off at a new foster home in the past he always expected, no he hoped, that I would at least last a couple months, but that never happened.

"Again Jack?" I shrugged my shoulders and shoved my way through the door and sat on the couch. "Thank you for bringing him by Green. I hope he didn't cause too much trouble. I just can't get a break. You know Jack's the only one that can't stay in a foster house for more than six months."

"I understand Mr. Caldwell. But listen…you're not planning to send him back to the Grover's are you?"

"Well, I have to call them and see." Green sighed.

"Why don't we go inside and talk to Jack and see." I picked up a cigarette that was lying on the table and lit it, taking a deep drag as I watched Green and Caldwell enter. "What in God's name are you doing Jack?"

I looked at Green and took another deep breath of the addictive nicotine before I answered. "That stupid huh? What does it look like I'm doing? I always knew cops were dumb but, damn."

"Don't push it Jack." I couldn't help but laugh at my social worker.

"You know you made me spend the last five months in the house of Satan. I really don't think you have any right to talk to me like that."

"What did you say to me?"

"Still deaf as ever old timer? Fuck you." Green quickly silenced Caldwell before the argument could escalate any higher. All I really wanted to do was curl up in a bed and sleep, maybe eat some hot soup, or take a bath. I was so tired of trying to protect myself, I just wanted to go to a place where I could give my tough act a rest and just be…me.

"You know from the way you act to me I can only wonder why the Grover's threw you out of their house too." My face went blank at what my social worker just said.

"They didn't throw me out."

"That's hard to believe."

"I had to get out. I had to run away."

_Flashback_

_What can I say about the Grover family? When I first arrived they seemed like a nice enough family. I thought they were going to be different having their own daughter and all but I was wrong. They always start off nice in the beginning, they all do, but it doesn't take long for them to show their true colors._

_I remember one night it was extremely late and I was hungry. They hadn't fed me for the past two days. It was about three in the morning so I figured I'd take a chance and grab something from the kitchen before I starved to death. I quietly maneuvered my way through the house and quietly entered the kitchen. I could already feel my mouth water with the thought of food so close at hand. I had my hand on the fridge door when suddenly the lights to the kitchen turned on. I felt my heart fall into the pit of my stomach and I slowly turned around. There standing in the hallway was my foster father, Paul Grover. He stood in the doorway with a beer bottle in his hand._

_"What in the hell do you think you're doing." It was just above a whisper and I could already feel myself start to shake in fear._

_"I just…I jus…I just…" I couldn't stop stuttering._

_"You just what boy?"_

_"I was just hungry." My palms were wet and my throat was dry._

_"You were hungry…" He gave a dark chuckle and took another drink from his beer. I remember at the beginning, I was defiant and rude, but I learned too quickly that Paul wasn't the type of man to take my attitude. "So you just thought you'd come into my kitchen, in my house, and take my food? Is that what you were going to do?" I knew what was going to come._

_"N..n…no." I couldn't keep my words straight._

_"You lying to me boy?" He took a step towards me and by instinct I took a step back only to find the fridge blocking my path. The next thing I knew his hand was wrapped around my neck and he hit my head hard against the fridge and threw my across the kitchen floor. I gasped for air trying to struggle through the reverberating pain in my head and trying to crawl on my hands and knees. "You pathetic piece of shit! You damn thief! I'm kind enough to open my doors for your fucked up ass and you try to steal from me!" I could feel the tears in my eyes from the pain and the fear._

_He then gave me two hard kicks in the stomach while I was still on all fours and I immediately doubled over in pain coughing from the lack of air. I was sobbing now, begging for him to stop but he didn't, he never did. He threw the beer bottle against the wall barely missing my head, but that didn't stop the shards of glass to scatter every where. I was sobbing and wet from the beer, but even through this I tried to crawl away. With each step I took crawling across the kitchen floor I could feel the glass from the beer bottle sink into and cut my hands and knees leaving a bloody trail. I didn't get far until he grabbed my hair and started dragging me and throwing me in the living room. All I could think about at that point was praying to God to put me out of my misery. I wasn't sure if I wanted to survive another beating._

_Paul came over and started tugging at my shirt, I tried my best to fight back, to push him away, to do anything, but he just punched me in the stomach to silence my efforts of escape. It was no use, I was too weak to fight him by myself. He stripped my shirt off and pushed me to the ground. He then took off his leather belt from his waist and wrapped it around his fist. I braced myself the best that I could when I felt the sharp sting of the leather belt make contact with the flesh on my back. "This will teach you to try and steal from me again piece of shit. You good for nothing pathetic prick!" And so it went on like this, it was one hit after another, after another, till I had no more strength the keep on all fours and no more voice to keep screaming for help that I knew would never come._

_I could hear Paul breathing hard from expending so much energy to beat me and then I heard a small whimper. With the little strength I had I looked towards the stair case only to see Jaime, Paul's daughter sitting in the darkness of the stair way crying for me. She was the same age as me, we didn't speak that often, her father never let her, but when she did she was sweet, kind, and she genuinely cared for me. I looked her straight in the eyes when Paul once again grabbed a hand full of my hair and started dragging me towards the stairs. I noticed Jaime run up the stairs and a sense of relief ran through my veins. I would hate to have seen her get punished at my expense, although I'd never seen Paul lay a finger on her. I was groaning from the pain resonating throughout my body, I could feel blood trickle down my back as I was dragged up the stairs. The next thing I knew Paul shoved me in the small hallway closet and locked the door. Finally…he was done._

_I didn't know how long I was in that closet but it wasn't long before the door opened. I cracked my eyes open to see who it was, it was Jaime._

_"Come on. My parents are going to be out for a while." She grabbed my hand and swung my arm around her shoulder trying her best to try and support my weight. I groaned in pain. "Let's get you to my bed, come on." I felt my legs crumple under me as we both fell down. "Come on…please Jack." I could hear the desperation in her voice. "Please let me help you." There were tears in her eyes, I didn't understand that. No one had ever cried for me before. I found myself sitting on her bed as she took out her first aid kit. I looked at her as she prepared the bandages and alcohol wipes. She had dark brown hair and green eyes. She was on the short side, only reaching to about 5'2, but she was…pretty. She took my hands and started wiping away the dried blood and pieces of glass that were still on my palms. I looked at her intently and couldn't help but laugh through my pain._

_"I don't understand how he could have a daughter like you." She didn't say anything. "Why are you doing this?" I asked seriously. She was still looking down at my hands when I grabbed her face so that she could look at me. There were more tears in her eyes, I suddenly became really soft. "Hey…hey. No need to cry for me, I'm fine see." I lifted one of my hands for her to see. "Nothing but a few scratches, plus I've been through a lot worse…your dad's not that tough."_

_"How could you say that?" Her soft and soothing voice finally spoke out. She looked into my eyes and started shaking her head. "Don't worry Jack…I'm going to get you out. It's not right what he's doing, so I'm going to get you out one of these days." It's hard to believe that moment was a few weeks ago._

End of Flashback

Amazingly she had kept her promise but I had barely made it out alive that day when I made my escape. It was one of the worst days of my entire life. But she had kept her promise.

"Then what happened, Jack?" Jerome shook my shoulders to get my attention again. I shook my head and put out my cigarette.

"I don't have to tell you anything." I crossed my arms and sat silently.

"Jack if you don't tell me what happened there's nothing I can do."

"Green…can you please talk to my social worker. It seems he doesn't understand the concept of me not wanting to talk about it." Green nodded.

"Mr. Caldwell, let me speak to you in private."

Authors Note: So what do you guys think? Getting better? Still good? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave me feedback after you read this. It pushes me to write better and more. Thank you so much!


	4. Chapter 4

Measures of myLife: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Yep, chapter four is finally up! Thanks again to all of you have reviewedI have some personal thanks yous down belowand to all my new readers please leave feedback. It is greatly appreciated, believe me. Hope you all enjoy. **

**xtOUCH tHE sKY: Yes,you caught my drift exactly. I'm glad you're enjoying my version of Jack. At least that's how I see him. Acting tough especially with his brothers, but in reality he's just sensitive. Thanks for your reviews, visit often, I'm working hard to post new chapters. **

**xNegAttentionx: You worded itbeautifully. I couldn't have described Jack better myself. And I'm sure we'd all love to take Jack home and cuddle with him. Who wouldn't! I'm so happy that you're enjoying the story. Oh yeah and Jaime...I just might let her stick around, who knows:)**

**pwrhungryir: Haha don't worry I'll try not to stop. Hopefully I won't ever encounter evil writers block. Thank you so much for taking the time to review, I'm thrilled that you really like my story, thanks for the support. **

**Yellow jersey girl: Sorry if it's on the short side. When I write it on microsoft word it seems really long and then I realize it's short. I'll try to make it longer, but it really depends on my attention span, but I'll try really hard. Thanks for the review.  
**

Chapter 4

I tapped my feet on the floor of the car, looking out my window watching the houses pass me by. The car slowly came to a stop in front of a quaint looking house that was painted white and covered in snow. I quietly studied it when my social worker's voice broke through my thoughts.

"End of the line kid. If you can't stay here, then I honestly have no where else to put you." He gave a sigh and turned to me. "Jack…I don't know what happened to you at the Grover's but Officer Green made me swear that I wouldn't send you back, so I'm taking his word on good faith." I rubbed my hands over my eyes and started digging through my pockets for a cigarette. "Her name is Evelyn Mercer, she's one of the best in the foster system. She'll take good care of you, just give her chance. Just a good few months Jack, without any trouble, that's all I'm asking." I sighed and lit my cigarette to calm my nerves.

"Easy for you to say."

"Put that out Jack. Fourteen year olds shouldn't be smoking." I laughed.

"There's a lot that shouldn't have been done to me while I was growing up. Believe me, having a cigarette once in a while is not that bad." The next thing I knew he had taken the cigarette out of my hand and threw it out the window. "Hey, what the fuck!"

"First impressions are important Jack. You can smoke yourself to death later, but first we go meet Ms. Mercer." A string of profanities left my mouth as I made my way to the front door. I was dreading it, I didn't know what to expect, hopefully there wouldn't be any beatings. I held my duffle bag close to my body and stood by Jerome's side as he knocked on the door. I stuffed my hands in my pockets and rocked back and forth on my feet. The door slowly opened revealing a small lady with graying hair and kind blue eyes.

"Ah…Mr. Caldwell, I've been expecting you. On time as always, come in, you both must be freezing." Jerome shuffled me inside and we both stood in front of the doorway, the warmth of the fireplace warming my bones. It smelled like cookies, god was I starving.

"Ms. Mercer, how have you been?" She smiled brightly and wiped her hands on her apron to give Jerome a handshake.

"I've been fantastic… and this must be Jack." She looked at me with her piercing blue eyes. I stared back cocking my head to the side.

"Yes, yes… this is the one I've been telling you about. This is Jack Bradshaw in the flesh. Jack this is Evelyn Mercer."

"Hello Jack, it's nice to finally meet you." I looked down at the hand that she was offering and looked back up into her eyes making no move to take her hand. I never understood the need of touching a stranger's hand when I didn't want to.

"Charmed I'm sure." I simply said and Evelyn's smile faltered. I gave her a smirk and looked to Jerome who was glaring at me.

"Jack that's now way to…"

"No, it's all right Jerome. He's in a new setting, it's understandable. Jack, why don't you go and sit in the living room while I have a few words with your social worker." I nodded my head and turned to Jerome.

"Well…I'll miss you buddy. I'll see you in oh, about a few weeks!" It was the most sarcastic tone I could come up with. I shoved my way passed Evelyn and sat on the couch. I don't know why I was being so hard on her she was just an old lady after all. But how could you blame me, every foster experience I ever had, as far back as I could remember, were not very pleasant. From what I heard from Jerome I was born in a community hospital in a another city not too far from Detroit. He told me right after I was born my mother gave me up to that baby surrender program, sometimes I wonder if it would've been better if she had just dumped me in a trash can, but no of course not, she wouldn't want to go to jail for murder. All I knew about my mother was that her last name was Bradshaw and that was it, I didn't even have one clue as to who my father was.

Jerome told me that I actually was on the verge of being adopted. A small extremely religious family, I'm told, took me in after about a year after I was born. I can't really remember them but Jerome said I was rebellious from the beginning. They kept me a grand total of three years before they labeled me the demonic child of Satan and that no matter what they did I could never be saved. They cancelled the adoption papers and never signed. I supposedly killed their precious dog by feeding it chocolate, I also supposedly broke over twenty thousand dollars worth of merchandise in their home, I also never stopped crying, I didn't eat properly, and I supposedly bit the finger of the priest that was trying to baptize me with the one tooth that I had. I think that was the last straw for them.

Of course I'm not saying all of my foster parents were abusive jackasses, they just all gave up too easily. Some of them threw me out because of my rebellious behavior and all the trouble I caused at school, something about being violent towards other kids. Jerome said I bit another kid in the arm for trying to take a red crayon from me, I was five. Others threw me out because of my drug problems, I do remember one of my foster parents getting extremely pissed when he found out I had downed his Crystal. That family only kept me for two months. In another family I had persuaded the actual children of the family I was staying with to try some marijuana, they were so fucked up, their parents were horrified. That family only kept me for about a week.

The families that kept me for more than two months were the ones that abused me. Whether it was a belt, a fist, a kick, attempted drowning, or throwing me down a flight of stairs it happened to me. But the worse I've ever been through was most definitely the Grover household.

I heard the door close and I found Evelyn standing in front of me smiling. "I have some people I'd like for you to meet. Why don't you all come down now, I know you've been listening." I then heard other voices.

"I told you she'd hear us."

"Hey it was your idea." It was then I heard a thunder of footsteps come down the stairs. I simply sat there as I watched three guys tumble down the stairs. One of the two black guys was holding a little girl and the third white guy stood there with a smile. Oh god, I don't think I can take these guys out, they were much too big.

"Jack, I'd like you to meet my three sons, that's Angel, Jeramiah, and the oldest one here is Bobby. And that little girl right there is Missy, she's four, she'll be staying with us for a while. Boys and girl meet Jack Bradshaw, he'll be staying with us till I can find him a family." They all waved at me in unison. I felt this sick knot in my stomach…what was that…I found myself growing angry…I wanted to wipe their pretty little smiles off their faces. I was jealous, it became so obvious to me. So I did the most obnoxious thing I could think to make them stop smiling, I started laughing as hard as I could. They all looked at me strangely and I just laughed harder. I stood on my feet and tried to catch my breath.

"Well, well…if it isn't the ghetto Brady bunch. I'd love to stay and chat but I'm just way too tired to put up with you. Hey wrinkles…" I turned to Evelyn, "You going to show me my room or do you have a nice closet fixed up for me?" I noticed the boy name Bobby clench his fist and glare at me.

"Her name is Evelyn." I looked straight into his brown eyes and glared back.

"I don't recall asking for your help."

"You'll show her some respect and call her by her proper name" Evelyn put her hand on her son's shoulders trying to restrain him.

"I'll call her whatever the fuck I want dickhead. Now why don't you shut the hell up." Somewhere in the back of my mind alarms started going off: Jack Bradshaw prepared to get you ass kicked by this Bobby. Bobby took a step forward and unconsciously I flinched and took a step back, he noticed this and stood still, staring at me with concern in his eye. I immediately looked away, ashamed that I had shown fear. It was then that Evelyn chimed in.

"Now boys, Jack has had a long and emotional day. Let's just all give him some space. Jack if you could follow me, I'll show you to your room." When she opened the door I was actually kind of pleased, I had a bed, my own desk, my own closet, things that I had never really had before. I entered the room and dropped my duffle bag on the ground. I looked at my hand and noticed it shaking, Bobby's sudden movement towards me had freaked me out. "Make yourself at home, the bathroom is across the hallway, and I hope you'll be joining us for dinner tonight, we're having roast beef." I heard her sigh as she silently closed the door. I finally let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding. I walked to the window and checked for possible escape routes that might come in handy. I wasn't going to unpack my bag, I never did, there was no point. I sat on the bed and opened my bag. The thought of Jaime came into mind she truly was my guardian angel. The bag held all of my clothes, an extra towel, a first aid kit, and some food. I hadn't bothered to open it after I left that house, I figured it was just my clothes. I remember how she threw the bag at me before I climbed out of the window. "Stay safe," she said, said before closing the window. I then noticed a white envelope, I slowly opened it and my mouth dropped open when I saw what it was. It was three hundred dollars, three hundred dollars, no one in my life had even given me a penny, and Jaime had freely given me three hundred dollars. There was a note also, it wasn't a long letter or anything, it was just a few quick scribbles.

_Jack,_

_Use the money for food and other necessities. Don't use it to get drugs or alcohol…promise! I'm sorry for all that you've been through, I'll miss you. Hopefully I'll see you again some day… Jaime_

**Authors Note: How was is it?Hope you all enjoyed it. Now you know what to do PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review!**


	5. Chapter 5

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Thanks to each and every one of you that review after reading each chapter. Keeps me inspired :). I can't tell you how much appreciate each of your comments. So here itis chapter 5. Justto add some warning, the subject matter you're about to read below is pretty intense. It was a daunting task to write it out but it had to be done. Enjoy!**

Chapter5

_Flashback_

_I walked towards the house and noticed cars lined up on the driveway. Great…his friends were here. I let out a sigh and ran my hands through my hair. I crept up the porch and quietly opened the door. I could hear voices coming from the kitchen, I knew they were drunk, most likely high off of something, there were beer bottles scattered around the living room. I quickly ran up the stairs not wanting to stick around. I was just about to close the door when a hand stopped it from closing._

_"Hey there Jackie boy, thought I heard you come in." The stench of alcohol on his breath was overwhelming and I nearly gagged as he gave me a sly smile. "I have some friends over. We got some people to entertain Jack…" I immediately reacted to his tone of voice and tried to slam the door closed but he pushed it back open with full force. Fear, that was the only thing I could feel at that moment, just fear. I could feel the blood pumping through my veins as he grabbed my arm and pulled me up. "You're coming with me." I tried pulling my arm free but he was too strong. I dug my heals into the ground trying to get away._

_"Let go of me! Get the fuck off of me!" The next thing I knew I hit the ground from the force of his fist making contact with my mouth. The metallic taste of blood slowly permeated through my mouth._

_"Daddy?" He stopped mid-punch and looked down the hall to see Jaime, his daughter, looking at him with fear. "Daddy what are you doing to him?" Her voice was shaking as tears started trickling down her face. I tried crawling towards her but he grabbed the back of my shirt before I could get anywhere._

_"Honey, go back inside okay. Everything is okay." He wrung his hand around my neck and pulled me to my feet. I coughed from the choking sensation that he was causing me._

_"Daddy stop! You're hurting him!"_

_"Sweetie, Jack did something bad today. He has to be punished, now go back to bad."_

_"Daddy please…"She was sobbing now begging him not to hurt me. It was a good effort, I truly did thank her for it._

_"Everything is going to be okay Jaime now get the hell back inside your bedroom and don't come out until I tell you!" His face was red from all the shouting. I looked out of the corner of my eye to see Jaime staring at me. She merely nodded her head and went back into her room. I stared off into her direction when he pushed me down the stairs. I groaned in pain, throbbing everywhere. "Well boys, look what we have here." I lifted my head and noticed four other men standing in front of me._

_"Damn Paul, you were right, ain't he a pretty little thing." I shivered in disgust more than fear. One of them leaned down towards me and grabbed my chin. "Aren't you a pretty boy you little fag." For some strange reason, because I was insane , I spat in the man's face. His smiled disappeared from his face as he wiped away my spit away. Then I felt Paul kick me hard in the gut._

_"You little fucker!" He kicked me again. I was trying not to break down, trying not to cry. Then I felt his friend grab my hair and drag me to the middle of the living room._

_"Stand up." I was on all fours trying to catch my breath when he grabbed me by my shoulder and stood me up. "I said stand up!"_

_"Don't fucking touch me." I pushed him back with all my strength as he fell to the ground. I took my chance and ran to the front door trying to get away but another guy caught my foot. I fell to the ground, he was dragging me towards him when I grabbed the nearest beer bottle and smashed it onto the side of his face. I tried to get away but he wouldn't let go of my leg even through all of his screaming. Come on Jack, don't let them take you down so easily, fight…even though you're afraid keep fighting._

_But it was no use, Paul and his friend both grabbed me by the arms and held me tight while the other two started to beat me. I couldn't think, my body was in so much pain I just wanted to die. I could feel the blood drip down my chin as they dragged me to the sofa. I was so exhausted. It was then they held my arm out and got my attention, I watched in horror as one of Paul's friend took his cigarette and lowered it to my arm. I started to struggle again but Paul held me down laughing. I screamed in pain as I felt the cigarette burn into my skin. They found this quite funny, watching me scream like that, so much so they decided to burn me four more times._

_My voice was raw, I was amazed that I hadn't passed out, but they still hadn't let me go. I was lying on the floor curled up in pain while the five men sat around me on the couches drinking their beer._

_"Ready for the real party to start?" I heard Paul state. They laughed in unison as one of the bigger men stood up from where he was sitting and stood in front of me._

_"Sit up." I did as I was told not wanting to get beat anymore. My eyes widened as I realized what he was doing. He unzipped his pants and pulled down his boxers shoving his dick in my face. That was it, all that was left of me started crumbling down as I realized what he was going to make me do. The tears started streaming down my face knowing that there was nothing I could do. I tried to look for an escape root when I felt cold steel press against the side of my face…it was Paul holding a gun._

_"Now Jack, don't be stupid. Do it or else I kill you. If you even think about trying to bite his dick off I swear you're gonna wish I had used the gun to kill you, you pathetic little shit." Before I could say anything else Paul's friend grabbed my face and shoved his dick in my mouth. I started to gag uncontrollably, my quiet tears turning into sobs. By the time he was done all I wanted to do was throw up but I didn't even have a chance for that because it was the next guys turn._

_After a while they threw me to the ground and started to fumble with my belt. "No." I started off softly. They undid my belt buckle and went for the buttons on my jeans. "No!" I screamed loudly this time. "No! Help! Somebody help me!" I was shouting at the top of my lungs and kicking as hard as I could. I could take the beatings, the cigarette burns, I could even stand getting mouth raped, but I wouldn't let them do this to me, I wouldn't let them take the little dignity that I had left. "No! JAIME! JAIME HELP ME! HELP!"_

_"Shit will you shut him up! Stop struggling goddamn it!"_

_"NO! JAIME! PLEASE JAIME!" I knew it was wrong of me to get her involved but what else could I do. Before I could scream anymore Paul shoved a gag in my mouth and the others proceeded to pull my pants down my hips when suddenly there was a knock at the door. They all froze mid-action and looked to each other._

_"Police open up." I felt my hopes rise as I noticed the sheer panic in their faces._

_"Fuck, hurry throw him upstairs." Two men grabbed me by the arms and dragged me up stairs throwing me into my room. As soon as I pulled my pants up I threw up on the floor. It tastes so bad…I have to get the taste out…make it go away._

_"Officer how can I help you?"_

_"We got an anonymous call that there was some trouble going on in here."_

_"Trouble sir? No, not here." The officer gave Paul a skeptical look._

_"No trouble huh? Then you wouldn't mind if I took a look around?"_

_I silently thanked the police for coming when the door suddenly opened. It was Jaime._

_"Come on Jack. We don't have much time!" She helped me up and took me to her room setting me down. "Here put this on." She handed me my leather jacket and opened her room window. "I'm sorry…" I looked at her with curious pain filled eyes as she dabbed the blood away from my lips. "It took me so long to find the courage to call the police."_

_"You did that for me?" She didn't answer my question as she pulled me to my feet. "Hurry, they'll be up any minute. Go through my window and run Jack. I know you're in a lot of pain Jack but I need for you to be alive, I need for you to stay alive, I need you to run. Don't look back until you know you're a safe distance away from here." I stood out on the terrace outside her window and she gave me a hug. I sighed, the sweet smell of vanilla and strawberry, I would never forget it. She pulled away and handed me my duffle bag, "Stay safe," was all she said before closing the window and I ran off into the night._

I suddenly woke up and found a little girl sitting on top of my chest staring at me intently. I was so surprised that I jumped causing Missy to fall off the bed. I gasped for air as I realized I had just lived my past again through my dreams. I looked down on the ground and found Missy pouting.

"Jack gave me a boo boo." I looked at her strangely as she huffed out of the room with an angry scowl on her face. It was at that moment Jeremiah came through the door.

"Did Missy not deliver the message?"

"What?" I stated angrily having just been woken up from my slumber.

"Dinner's ready." I rolled my eyes and ran my hand through my hair.

"Go pig out yourself I'm not hungry." It was then my stomach grumbled loudly, I looked down at my stomach disappointed that it had betrayed me. I looked back up and found Jeremiah staring at me.

"Right…wash your hands before you come down to eat."

Authors Note: Depressing I know! Sorry if it was kind of harsh, hope you still found it good though. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave some feedback.


	6. Chapter 6

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Sorry the last chapter was so traumatic. But I'm glad you guys were able to enjoy it. Wrote chapter six in the wee hours of the morning so hopefully it's not too bad. I was supposed to be doing homework but of course I chose to write another chapter :). Thanks again to all those who review, I love and appreciate each and every one of you!**

Chapter 6

I walked down the stairs and followed the voices coming from what I assumed was the dining room. It suddenly became quiet as they all looked at me. Think of something to say…

"You guys act like you've never seen a human before." I sat in the closest seat that I could find which was next to Angel across from Bobby. I started drumming my thumbs on the table trying to fill the silence when Evelyn walked in with a bowl of salad.

"Oh Jack, I'm so pleased you joined us. Well now that the whole family is down why don't we start." I picked up my fork more than ready to eat when I heard Evelyn clear her throat. All the people around me had their hands clasped together ready for prayer.

"You've gotta be kidding me."

"Jack at this table, in this house, we always say a prayer before we eat. Why don't you start us out." I dropped my fork on the plate and sighed.

"Okay…Let's see what can I say…Thank you God for making me survive another beating, thank you for making my mom dump me in Detroit of all cities, thank you for blessing me with the most fucked up life ever…in God's name we pray. Amen!" I rubbed my hands together and looked around the table. I could tell Jeremiah and Angel were trying their best to suppress a smile while Evelyn and Bobby didn't look too happy. "Let's eat!"

"Grandma Evie, Jack said a bad word."

"That he did." Evelyn stared at me with a look of disappointment.

"Smart kid there."

"My name is Missy."

"Right." Sometimes I wondered why I had to be a jackass. It's not like they did anything to hurt me just yet but I couldn't help it, trust no one. "Hey cut me some slack. I never prayed before never found the use for it. If I do say so myself I thought it was decent, but not to worry, I promise they'll get better as time goes by." I then looked at Bobby. "Mind passing me the roast beef…BRO…" I smirked as I noticed his eye twitch. He grabbed the plate and shoved it into my hand. I took it with a fake smile plastered on my face and took two pieces and handed it off to Angel. Thankfully Jeremiah broke the tensions by talking about his day and his girlfriend. I was pretty much silent for the rest of the meal as I stuffed all the food into my mouth as quickly as possible. One great thing about Evelyn was that she knew how to cook. It seemed the food disappeared too soon and it wasn't long before I started to stare longingly at the remaining food items on the table.

"Jack…would you like some seconds?" She was actually offering me seconds, that was a first. I was never allowed to take seconds in a meal.

"You're offering me seconds." I gulped and Evelyn gave a warm smile.

"Of course, we have plenty of food here Jack, any time you want to eat more, just help yourself, you don't need permission from anybody. Not here." I looked at her in awe as she added more food to my plate. I was speechless.

"Uh…thanks."

"No need to thank me Jack. This is your home now." I silently nodded my head and picked up my fork again.

"So Jack, you play any hockey?" I looked to Angel to see that he was waiting for an answer.

I shrugged my shoulders, "kind of."

"Well then maybe you can play with us sometime. Bobby here, he's planning to go pro in not too long you know." I looked to Bobby and lifted both eye brows.

"That so…"

"Yeah man he's really good."

"No offense Angel but does it look like I really care?" That was about the time I heard Bobby sigh loudly. I was just about to tell him to fuck off when he just held up his hand to try and stop me from whatever I was about to say.

"Jack, are you fag?" I felt my mouth go dry, I wasn't expecting a comeback so soon.

"What?" Trying to keep my temper in check.

"What?" He imitated me in a high pitched voice. "You fucking deaf too man? I said are you a fag?" I gripped the fork in my hand and Evelyn tried to intervene.

"Missy sweetie, why don't you go upstairs and get ready for bed." She jumped from her seat and ran up the stairs. "Now that is quite enough Bobby, it's Jack's first day."

"Oh what Jack, now you need ma to defend you huh?" I looked him straight in the eye trying to keep my breathing under control.

"I can defend myself."

"Is that right? Then why don't you, fag." All of sudden the memories of my last night at the Grover's flashed through my mind. I could already taste the sick taste of their cum on my lips.

"I am not gay." I was saying it more to reaffirm my own belief then saying it to Bobby.

"Leave it alone man. Stop messing with him." Jeremiah stated trying to stop Bobby.

"Come on Jack. Admit it, you wear your fucking bracelets and necklaces, your emotions are all over the place. A jackass one minute and a total saint when you're given seconds, you're more emotionally unstable than Ma here." I could feel the tears start to well in my eyes. Don't cry Jack, don't show them.

"Bobby stop it this instant."

"No ma I won't. He needs to get a little taste of his own medicine. You opened your doors to him, gave him food, and I won't stand by and let this punk treat you like shit no matter how fucked up of a situation he came from cause guess what Jackie we have all been there!" I stood from my seat and was about to get away when Bobby grabbed a hold of my arm, immediately the image of Paul ran through my head. "Where you going man, I ain't done with you yet."

"Bobby man let him go!" Angel grabbed Bobby's shoulder but it was no use.

"Let me go."

"No, not till you hear me out."

"I said…let me go." Mental images of that night kept flashing before my eyes and the taste of cum hit me full force.

"No, I said…"

"Don't fucking touch me!" I wrenched my arm away from his iron grip and ran up the stairs heading straight to the bathroom. I threw myself over the toilet and started vomiting everything I had eaten. As I hung my head over the toilet I noticed a movement out of the corner of my eye. It was Missy standing in the doorway of the bathroom.

"Jack okay?"

"Leave me alone." I sighed losing my patience quickly.

"Jack…"

"I said leave me the fuck alone!" I shouted and I watched her scamper away. I stood up and slammed the door closed. I needed to clean myself, I felt so dirty, so used, I needed to get rid of this feeling. I needed to get rid of the sick taste in my mouth. I found mouth wash in the cabinet and rinsed my mouth about four times. I then grabbed a random toothbrush and brushed my mouth until I felt my gums begin to bleed. I looked into the mirror and was disgusted by what I saw. I looked at my reflection and started to cry, "You are not gay. They forced you to do it…you're not…I am not…" I turned away and stripped my clothes off. I sat in the shower and turned on the water letting the heat poor down on me. As I sat there I noticed a shaver on the shower rack and picked it up with my fingers. I stared at it intently before looking down at my arm understanding what I had to do. I was in too much pain, I had to get this memory out, some way, somehow, even if it meant covering it up with physical pain. I slowly set the razors on my wrist and dug as deep as I could into the flesh until I drew blood. I smiled as I watched my blood trickle down the bathtub as I proceeded to cut my other wrist.

Freedom…at least…for a short while.

**Authors Note: So what did you guys think? I know you guys want Jack to open up to the Mercer's but only time will tell. Hope you liked this chapter and I'll be working hard to post up the next chapter soon. Please please please review!**


	7. Chapter 7

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: I'm so glad all of you are enjoying Jack's character. I always keep the film in mind. We see sensitive moments in Jack like in the scene when he sees Evelyn at the dinner table but we should always keep in mind when Green first introduced the brothers. He said, "That's Jack, first class fuck up." I wanted to stay true to that hahaha! With Bobby I never saw him as someone who would be very sympathetic when you first meet him. He seems like that kind of guy you need to warm up to. I don't know if any of you guys feel this way but I don't think Bobby would really feel sorry for Jack for coming in because Bobby came from somewhere very similar, seems like he would say "hey man suck it up." Especially if it was to someone he barely knew. So I'm glad you like the fact that I didn't make Bobby all kind hearted. As I promised...my beloved readers...chapter 7. **

Chapter 7

_"No one wants you, you worthless fuck. You are nothing, you are shit, without me no one would want to take you cause you are an utter fuck up…"_

I suddenly awoke from my sleep in a cold sweat, my cut wrists throbbing. Why couldn't the dreams just stop? I sighed loudly and ran my hands through my hair. God, what I would do for a hit right about now. I slowly moved off of my bed and opened the door looking down the hallway hearing the distant snores of Angel and Jeremiah. I could just run, I could just try and get away…but where would I go? Sleep in an alley way next to a trash can? At least here I had a bed. I crept down the stairs and made my way to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and looked through the beverages. Water, orange juice, milk, Capri sun, and yes, exactly what I was looking for, beer. I grabbed a bottle and opened it as quickly as I could. I put the bottle to my lips and could nearly taste the cool beverage on my lips when a voice startled me and I nearly dropped the bottle.

"What are you doing?" I saw Bobby standing in the kitchen doorway with his coat on and blood on his fists. I could feel my heart rate speed up and my mouth become dry. The blood on his fist was an easy enough sign to figure out that he was very capable of beating me to death. He realized I was staring at his hands and walked to the sink starting to scrub off all evidence of what he had done. "I asked you a question."

"What does it look like I'm doing." I bit my tongue to restrain myself from saying anything else stupid. I really needed to learn how to think before I spoke. I watched him wipe his hands on a towel, slowly turning around to look at me. He gave a slight laugh and shook his head.

"Still have a damn attitude."

"So do you."

"No…I only treat people the way they treat me. There's a difference. What did ma ever do to you?" I stood silently not knowing what to say and feeling stupid. "Hand over the beer." I looked down at the bottle in my hand and looked back up at him. His hand was held out waiting for me to give it to him. "Come on, don't make me take it from you, I'm too tired tonight." I reluctantly gave the bottle to Bobby and he quickly took a gulp for himself. I looked down at my feet not knowing what else to do. "Look…I don't want this to sound like an apology or anything cause I don't think you deserve one but…I didn't really mean half of the things I…"

"Right." I cut him off before he could continue any further. He was trying so hard to be nice it was slightly pathetic. I heard him chuckle lightly.

"If it makes you feel any better ma slapped me right across the face after you ran off. She's old but she can still serve up a hell of a slap with considerable force." My forehead wrinkled up as I looked at him curiously, she actually did that? He nodded as if he knew what I was thinking. "Look on the bright side Jack. By this time tomorrow ma's going do everything she possibly can to find a family to adopt you. Then you can get out of here and never see my face again. Hopefully you'll have better luck than I did." His voice sounded sad as he took another swig of his beer. A family to adopt me…was he kidding? I smiled with bittersweet acceptance.

"I'm fourteen years old and I have file folder thick with papers on my not so respectable reputation. She's never going to find a family to take me in. I realized that after I had gone through my tenth foster home." I looked up to face him with a blank face. "I don't even care if I get adopted or not."

"Ha…we all try to think that way. But deep down it's all the same, you know what you really want." There was a look of understanding in his eyes as he continued to sip his beer. "Wow…did we just have a civilized conversation just now?" And for the first time…in a long time, it seemed a genuine smile broke out on my face. "See, you do know how to speak without being a jackass once in a while."

"Yeah well…I'm just being agreeable so you can leave cause you're standing in between me and the beer." Bobby cocked his right eye brow.

"Ha ha very funny. You ain't drinking nothing tonight Cracker Jack."

"The names Jack."

"Okay Jackie Poo." I gave a loud sigh trying my best not to start whining. I suddenly remembered the blood on his hand and me being curious I couldn't help but to ask.

"What happened to your hands?" His face suddenly became serious as he looked down at his hands.

"Nothing…"

"Are you sure, cause there was a lot of blood."

"Business, Jack, just taking care of some business." His expression was unreadable as he walked to sit on a nearby dining chair. "Why don't you grab yourself a cup of milk and sit down."

"I don't have to listen to…"

"Can we not start this again?" He looked at me sternly as I sat across from him. There was a moment of awkward silence when he asked a question.

"How did you get that?"

"What?"

"That…"I looked down at what he was pointing at and I realized he was pointing at my tattoo. Spares. "How'd you get that?"

"I don't remember." I grumbled through my teeth, I really don't have any recollection on how I got that tattoo.

"What?"

"I said I don't remember." Bobby smirked as he tried to comprehend what I had just said.

"How does that work out?" I sighed not wanting to have a conversation about my random moment of drunk stupidity.

"I was completely fucked up all right. A lapse of judgment on my part. All I remember is waking up with major pain on my arm one morning only realize that I had gotten this tattooed on me." I could tell he was trying not to laugh at me and all it did was piss me off.

"So…what exactly does that mean…Spares?"

"Get a dictionary."

"You know what I mean man." I mumbled my answer to him but he just continued to stare at me.

"I'm sorry what? You think you can speak a little bit more clearly."

"I said it's the name I want my band to be."

"…the name of your future band…" It was about that time that he burst out laughing. His face was contorted, his hands clutching his stomach. "Oh man….oh god!"

"Hey fuck you man."

"I'm sorry…I'm sorry…it's just…oh man…hold on…I can't breath." His laughs slowly died down and he looked at me with a flushed face. "I'm sorry Jack…I'm sure your boy band will be very successful." Did he just call my rock band dream a group of pretty boy pansies? "Jesus…you shouldn't drink Jack, it seems you really do, do stupid things when you're piss drunk." I stood from my seat and grabbed his beer. "HEY!" I chugged the rest of it down as fast as I could and slammed the bottle back on the table. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and glared down at Bobby.

"Fucker." I walked out of the kitchen when I heard his voice ring out.

"Oh yeah Jackie, that was such a manly thing to do! And what did I say about drinking in this house!"

"BITE ME!" I shouted at the top of my lungs and grumbled in anger all the way up the stairs. When suddenly Evelyn came walking into the hall.

"What's going on? Jack is everything okay?" She stood there looking at me with a concerned eye.

"Ms. Mercer…Bobby forced alcohol down my throat not only that he came back just a few minutes ago with blood on his fists, and believe me it wasn't his blood."

"He what? BOBBY! What on earth did you do now?" Evelyn walked passed me down the stairs and I went into my room. I laid in bed knowing that it wouldn't be long until…

"He told you what? That fucking shithead!" I heard Bobby yell and all I could do was lie there with a smirk on my face for the rest of the night.

**Authors Note: Thought I'd make this chapter a little light-hearted after all the torture I put poor Jack through. What did you guys think? Hope you all liked it! Now you know what to do review review review review:)**


	8. Chapter 8

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Okay everybody chapter 8 here. Hope you all are still enjoying this story. Thanks again to all of you have reviewed**.

Chapter 8

I knew I was going to have to do something. I was surprised that I had even lasted this long. I looked down at my hands and noticed them shaking. I tried to stop it but I couldn't. I needed to get out and needed to get drugs into my system very soon. I closed my eyes and held my hands close to my body as I curled up in my bed. As soon as everyone was asleep…I would make my move. I heard the door open behind me and sighed.

"Go away." There was no answer. I slowly turned my head to see who it was when suddenly a bucket of ice water was dumped on me. A string of curses left my mouth as I realized who had just done it, Bobby. "What the fuck!" I sat in bed sopping wet, with teeth chattering from the cold water.

"You didn't think I'd let you get away with it did you? Lying to ma like that about what I did." He stood over me with a grim look on his face.

"Are you fucking kidding me!" He just glared at me with his arms crossed over his chest. I tried to get out of bed I was shoved back down.

"You don't get away with shit like that around here you understand." I tried to push him out of the way again but failed.

"You want me to fucking freeze to death move."

"Did you even hear a single word I just said? You don't sell out your brothers like that you hear!" I stood up immediately facing him, our noses nearly touching.

"I am not your brother." He seemed shocked for a moment and we stood silently simply staring at each other.

"You're shaking."

"Yea well you just dumped a bucket of ice on me how the hell am I supposed to feel."

"No…you're eyes are red."

"Get out of my way." He took a step to the left and let me pass. I went into the bathroom and took off my soaking shirt. I had made my decision, I needed to find money, and I needed… I opened the mirror cabinet in front of me and looked through the various prescription drugs to satisfy my immediate needs. I grabbed a random bottle and took out three pills. Three wouldn't kill me…although I wouldn't mind if it did. I was just about slip them in my mouth when the door opened. I sighed in frustration, couldn't they afford a damn lock?

"Oh hey…sorry man." It was Jeremiah. He looked at me then looked down at what I was holding in my hand. "You feeling okay Jack?"

"I'm fine." I grumbled through clenched teeth.

"You don't look fine… Maybe we should go to the doctors…" I turned to face him.

"Thanks for the concern…but no one ever cared before, and I sure as hell don't need you hovering all over my well being now. So why don't you do us all a favor and give me some fucking privacy." It didn't seem to faze him though, he just looked at me with a concerned eyes and shook his head.

"Do you even know what you're taking?" I sighed loudly and turned back around facing the mirror. I looked at his reflection and gave him a smirk.

"Stop me then." I threw the pills in my mouth and swallowed as hard as I could trying my best not to choke.

"NO! What are you doing man!" I ran my hands through my hair and shook my head trying to contain myself.

"Excuse me Jerry, I need to take a shower." I pushed him out of the bathroom and slammed the door. I was definitely pushing my luck with the brothers. I gave them attitude, ratted Bobby out, pushed Jeremiah, I wouldn't be surprised when one day they would have enough of my crap and beat the shit out of me only to throw me out like all the others.

After taking a warm shower and changing into some dry clothes I made my way downstairs. I'll sneak out at around one tonight. I could use the money Jaime gave me…but I had promised her not to use the money in that way…I could always steal something from this house. I looked around the living room to see if I could find anything valuable.

"Jack? Why don't you come into the dining room and eat lunch." As I walked into the dining room I noticed Bobby and Jeremiah whispering among themselves glancing at me every now and then. Thoughts of panic started running through my head, did they know? Were they planning to beat me? "Jack, are you feeling all right dear? Jeremiah told me he saw you taking some pills."

"Yeah…I had a headache. It was just some Tylenol." Jeremiah gave a sarcastic laugh and looked at me.

"Please…Tylenol my ass." I glared at him.

"Why don't you mind your own business?"

"Boys." Evelyn stopped the argument before it could start. "Jack I trust that you're smart enough to know how to take care of yourself in a healthy manner?" I looked into her blue eyes and felt like she could see right through my façade. I tried to focus on something else, her gaze too intense for me to look into. "If you are really sick I better make you some of my chicken noodle soup. Don't want to feel bad on your first day of school in two days." An uncomfortable silence settled among the four of us when there was a sudden knock at the door. "Bobby, could go please answer the door?"

"Of course ma." I continued to silently look down at the floor when I heard a familiar voice coming from the front door.

"Does Jack Bradshaw live here?"

"Who's asking?" Bobby looked him over from head to toe trying to deem him a friend or foe.

"Uh… my name is Logan. I'm a friend of Jack's." I ran to the door before Bobby could slam the door in Logan's face.

"Hey…" A look of recognition passed on Logan's face. Bobby turned to me then glanced back at Logan.

"You know this punk?"

"Yeah, he's a friend." Bobby glanced at both me and Logan one final time before walking to the living room still staying in earshot. "Mind if I get some privacy?"

"No." I rolled my eyes and turned back to Logan.

"You okay man? I saw you being taken in by Green." I nodded my head.

"Yeah I'm all right."

"Took me forever to figure out where you were staying. Your social worker threatened to call the police for assault if I didn't leave him alone."

"How'd you find out?"

"Met up with Jaime, she told me where you were." My heart clenched at the thought of her.

"How is she?"

"Not too good. Last I saw her she had a nice bruise on her face."

"Shit… I knew I should've stayed." Logan looked alarmed.

"What? If you stayed there he would've killed you!"

"At least when I was there he never touched her!" I shoved my hands in my pockets and sighed in frustration.

"Naw Jack. It would've only been time. Sooner or later he would've killed you and moved on to her." I tried to holding back my tears of guilt.

"I should go see how she's doing."

"No way man. I'm not gonna let you go and get yourself killed."

"But…"

"But nothing man! Plus…I'm sure she'll figure out a way to get in contact with you. Although I'm not sure how, it might be a while before she can, but she will." Logan glanced over my shoulder to see Bobby still standing there with a somber look on his face. "Hey, come on Jack, I've got something to cheer you up." He handed me a carton of cigarettes and I couldn't help but smile. There are friends who are willing to come down to the jail station and pay your bail, and then there are your best friends that would be sitting right next to you in the jail cell, that would be Logan. To say that Logan grew up in a broken home would lead to the assumption that he came from a home in the first place. No, Logan's home was on the streets, unless you call the four correctional facilities that he was sent to a home. I met him the second time I was sent to juvie a couple of years back and ever since then we've been like green eggs and ham.

"Thanks. You have no idea how much I've been craving one of these." He chuckled under his breath.

"I'm sure you've been craving a lot more than that." There was a look of understanding in his eyes.

"You have no idea. I've come down to swallowing prescription drugs for god sakes." I lowered my voice into a hushed whisper so that Bobby wouldn't hear. "You got anything on you right now?"

"Fuck no man. I'm broke, the police took all my shit last time." I was filled with utter disappointment.

"Meet me at the corner of this street at around 1:30 tonight. We'll figure something out."

"You going to sneak out of here?"

"Yeah."

"What about him?" He nodded towards Bobby.

"He hasn't tried anything yet. Just wait for me tonight okay?"

"Okay. I'll see you later man." I watched him walk away when I heard Bobby chime in.

"What was all that whispering about? Saying sweet nothings to your sweetheart?" I slammed the door closed and gave him the middle finger.

"If you're insinuating that he's gay let me just tell you that he's screwed more girls than you and your brothers combined."

"Defending him now are you Fairy?" I tried my best to ignore him and made my way up the stairs. "Give me those cigarettes Jack."

"Go fuck yourself."

"Well you can't smoke them in this house."

"Who said I was going to smoke them."

"Right…"

"They hold sentimental value. I want to keep them close to my heart." I stated sarcastically and went to my room.

**Authors Note: So...what do you think? Good, bad? Please please please review and leave feedback!**


	9. Chapter 9

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Hey what happened to all of the feedback people! To the one person that did review thanks a bunch! This one is dedicated to you, XNegAttentionX! It's only proper! Hope everybody enjoys the next chapter**.

Chapter 9

I pulled on my leather jacket and crept down the stairs. The house was dark and all I could hear was distant snoring. Earlier that evening I had snuck into Evelyn's room and had taken some money out of her bedside drawer. I didn't know whether to feel guilty or not, but I was desperate. Before I knew it I had made it out of the house. I ran down the street and saw Logan standing at the corner smoking a cigarette. I shivered in the cold weather and rubbed my hands together trying to gather some warmth.

"What took you man? I've been out here freezing my ass off."

"Sorry…they sleep later than I thought they would." He threw his cigarette on the ground and sighed.

"So, you got any money."

"Not nearly enough. We need more." I looked at Logan and he smiled.

"You thinking what I'm thinking Jackie?"

"You bet." We walked down the street and made our way to the local bar. It was the perfect time to steal the wallets of unsuspecting drunks. We stood in the alley way and watched multiple men stumble out of the bar's exit. "How about that guy?"

"Which guy?"

"That one in the black jeans and leather jacket." Logan shook his head.

"No, he doesn't look like he's got much money on him. That one." My eyes fell upon an old man wearing a very nice business suit. "Go get him Jackie." I casually walked out of the alley and towards the businessman. He was singing at the top of his lungs, the stench of alcohol strong. Ok Jack…here we go. I slammed into him rather hard and slipped my hand into his pocket successfully pulling out his wallet.

"What the hell! Watch where you're going old timer!" He was scowling at me rubbing his chest, trying to catch his breath.

"You kids these days! Need to show some respect!" He howled at the top of his lungs as he stumbled on his way grumbling under his breath, something about kids being worthless. I walked back to the alley where Logan gave me a hard pat on the back.

"You still got it Jack. I'm so proud. So let's see what the sucker's got." I opened the wallet to see what he had. "Well?" I smiled at Logan. I took out the two hundred dollar bills rolled up inside the wallet and showed it to him.

"Guess we hit it big tonight." He was grinning from ear to ear.

"That we did! Come on, trash the wallet and let's get out of here." I threw the wallet in the dumpster and followed Logan.

"You know where we're going?"

"Yeah, I know a guy. Just follow me." I trailed his footsteps with just a bit of apprehension.

_Next day…._

It was late afternoon when I fell through the door of the Mercer household. I couldn't see straight, my stomach was doing flips, and I had the biggest headache in the world. Not only that my throat was so dry I didn't think I would be capable of speaking and I felt like I was dying of hunger. I didn't really remember much of what I did that night. All I could remember were moments. Logan and I were able to get some marijuana and cocaine with the money we had, not to mention all the booze. I even remember taking some strange pills that Logan's friend had given me. The next thing I knew I felt hands grabbing the collar of my jacket and I was thrown onto the living room couch. I groaned with pain as I opened my eyes to see who it was. There standing before me was Bobby, Angel, Jeremiah, and Evelyn. The boys looked pissed and I would've been afraid but I was just way too fucked up to function properly.

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?" Bobby screamed in my face. I covered my ears with my hands.

"I can hear you Jesus!" I sighed as I made myself comfortable on the couch, simply exhausted. Jeremiah and Angel held Bobby back before he could do anything to hurt me.

"Where've you been Jack? You got Ma and us all worried." Jerry stated calmly having a firm grip on his emotions. I shrugged my shoulders.

"I'm alive aren't I?"

"You look like shit." Angel chimed in.

"Yeah well, you look like an ass, we can't all be perfect now can we."

"Why you little…"Angel was just about to attack me when it was Bobby that stopped him.

"You nearly gave ma a heart attack Jack."

"You nearly gave ma a heart attack Jack." I mimicked Bobby but at a pitch about eight octaves higher. There was nothing funny about it, but I burst out laughing clutching at my stomach. Jerry shook his head.

"Man, he still high." In the midst of my laughing Bobby picked me up from the front of my collar and shook me.

"What the hell are you doing? You realize you're killing yourself? You god damn stupid kid, what the hell are you doing to yourself!" The laughter was immediately replaced by a sick feeling in my stomach. I grimaced and the next thing I knew I had my head hanging down vomiting all of over Bobby's nice shoes. It would take him a while to get the smell of throw up off of it. I heard a multiple of eew's and oh sick's when Bobby let my collar go. I stumbled backwards and I suddenly felt faint. I was unsteady on my feet and there was nothing I could do to stop myself from completely passing out. Everything became black.

I woke up later that night with a splitting headache. I realized I was in bed and turned to the side. Evelyn was sitting next to my bed with a towel in her hand. She wiped my forehead and I slowly opened my eyes.

"What time is it?" I groaned.

"9:53 P.M." She stated simply continuing to wet my forehead. Once I became aware of my body senses I suddenly sat up surprising Evelyn. The high had worn off, my brain was already begging for more and I reached down to my pocket but realized I was in my boxers and a t-shirt. I got out of bed and immediately rummaging through the pile of clothing gathering in the corner of my room. Where is it? Where is it? Shit, I need it, where is it?

"Looking for this?" I slowly turned around and saw Bobby standing in the doorway with a tiny sac of my cocaine between his finger tips.

"Jack dear, why don't you lay back down. You've had a long night." I couldn't even hear Evelyn's words, my eyes fixed upon the tiny sac of cocaine in Bobby's hand.

"Give it back to me." A twinge of desperation creeping into my voice.

"Sorry Jack. This is a habit you're going to have to kick back as long as you're under this roof." Before he could walk away I let my body take control. I tackled Bobby straight to the ground. Both of us landed with the thud as the cocaine slid across the hallway. I crawled off of Bobby and scrambled towards the small sac on my hands and knees when I felt a hard tug at my ankle. I looked back to find Bobby adamantly holding onto my ankle pulling me back towards him. Without really think about what I was doing I gave him a kick with my free leg, I assume it hit somewhere on the face from the groans of pain. It was within my grasp, I was so close.

"Jerry! The coke man, the coke! Stop him!" Bobby yelled holding onto his jaw. The next thing I knew I was tackled into the wall by Jeremiah. Sharp pain permeated throughout my back as I tried to push Jerry off of me.

"No! It's Mine!" Jerry held me back as well as he could.

"Jack…just…calm down!" He was grunting with effort. I watched Bobby pick up my prized possession and head to the bathroom.

"You son of a bitch!" I shoved Jerry off of me only to run into Angel who was a lot a harder to fight off than Jerry was. I watched in misery as Bobby emptied the contents of the plastic sac into the toilet bowl and watched it flush down the toilet. "NO! You piece of shit! Do you even know how much that cost me!"

"That's no way to be spending Ma's money Jack!" All I could see was red. All I felt was anger, pure hatred towards the Mercer's from keeping me from what I wanted to do the most. The next thing I knew me and Bobby were in an all out brawl with Jerry and Angel trying to separate me from Bobby. Somewhere in the distance I could hear Missy crying and Evelyn screaming at us to stop.

I didn't even know who was fighting who, it was so hectic, a bundle of bodies in the middle of the hallway playing indoor football. But it all abruptly stopped as I landed on the wooden floor knocking my head pretty hard on the ground. My hands flew up to my face trying to make the pain I was feeling subside. Someone's head, fist, or knee had hit me hard. I looked down at my hands only to see it covered in blood. I blinked for a second realization finally hitting me.

So this is what they are capable of doing. At least Paul never made me bleed this much on a first hit. But if they could do this…what else could they do to me. Fear started to overtake me as I held onto my nose which was bleeding profusely. I looked up at the three brothers with their mouths hanging open, with pain and terror in my eyes.

"Jack…I'm so sorry. I…I didn't mean to hit you Jack…it was an accident honest. Jack please…" Bobby seemed heart broken as he reached out a hand and took a step towards me.

"Get away from me! Don't touch me!" I tried my best at crawling away from him. All of my cocky, brave façade gone. Leaving me defenseless and exposed. I felt the tears trickle down my cheeks. I couldn't trust him, I couldn't trust any of them. I knew it was only a matter of time.

"Wait Jack! It was an accident!" All I could do was sob harder.

"Please…don't hurt me." That's all I could say through my sobs as I crawled towards Evelyn, hiding behind her legs trying to shield myself from Bobby. I closed my eyes wishing that I had never even attempted to get the cocaine back.

I never saw the unshed tears in Bobby's eyes as he ran out of the house into the streets of Detroit.

**Authors Note: Okay so now that you've read you know what to do! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave me some feedback!**


	10. Chapter 10

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! I can't tell you how much each review means to me. In fact after reading all of them I immediately started writing chapter 10. This is the finished product. Sorry it's kind of short but I hope it's to your liking all the same. **

Chapter 10

I sat outside on the roof terrace right outside my bedroom window smoking a cigarette. I exhaled and watched the smoke slowly evaporate into the blue sky. I hadn't spoken to any of the brothers since that night, Bobby hadn't even given me a glance. I lightly touched my cheek and grimaced. Luckily I didn't break my nose but I sure did get a nice bruise. I sighed and took another puff of my cigarette. Last night Logan had come over again but was chased off by Angel. I was too depressed and angry with myself to do anything about it. I heard a light knock on my door and I looked back through the window to see who it was…it was Evelyn.

"Jack?" God, what the hell did she want now? I threw the cigarette into the snow on the front lawn and crawled back through the window.

"Yeah?" She looked at me sternly and shook her head.

"You may be smoking yourself to death but I appreciate you not smoking in my house." I rolled my eyes and sat on the bed. I noticed her set some things on top my sock drawer

"What is that?" My curiosity had gotten the better of me.

"These? Just some overdue housewarming gifts I suppose."

"right…" She slowly walked back to the door and left me alone again. Once I knew she was downstairs I went to look through the things that she had brought me. I could feel a lump in my throat begin to form as I saw what it was. It was a brand new tooth brush, some new socks, boxers, a bathrobe. Now this may seem like pretty pathetic housewarming gift but to me, it meant the world. How long have I been using the same god damn toothbrush and I can't even tell you how many socks I have with gaping holes. It was the nicest thing that any foster parent had ever done for me. Every inch of my being was telling me to just trust her, to give her a chance, but I was so afraid to fully depend on someone in fear that they would simply betray me.

It was then that I heard a car pull up the driveway. I looked out the window to see who it was when I noticed a middle aged couple get out of the car and make their way up to the house. They couldn't have been older than forty-five. I heard the doorbell ring and seeds of suspicion started to seep into my mind.

"Oh my goodness, Mr. and Mrs. Wintchell I wasn't expecting you so early. Please, please come in."

"Yes, we're so sorry Ms. Mercer. It's just that my wife and I were just looking forward to this meeting. I hope our being earlier isn't much of an inconvenience."

"No not at all." I stepped out of my room and silently sat at the top of the staircase trying my best to eavesdrop. "May I offer you some coffee or pie?"

"Oh no, please don't trouble yourself. We just wanted to say that, after reviewing the files and back ground we would love to sign the adoption papers. After seeing the pictures, we just knew we had to make the poor child a part of our family." I felt my mouth go dry. I instantly remembered the night Bobby told me that Evelyn would do everything in her power to try and find me a family.

"That's so good to here. From what I've heard and read as well you would be the perfect family. I truly believe both of you will be able to give a child a safe and loving environment. I can't tell you how much of an impact adopting a child can be. It may be difficult at the beginning but as they grow older you two will become their heroes." I could almost see the tears of joy in the woman's eyes as Evelyn stopped speaking. "Now all that's said and done. Would you like to meet him?" I felt like my heart was beating out of my chest.

"Him? Oh no Ms. Mercer it wasn't a him."

"Oh no don't be silly, Jack?"

"No, Ms. Mercer you don't…

"Jack why don't you come down here."

"Ms…"

"Jack? I have some people I want you to meet." It felt like an outer body experience as I marched down the stairs to meet the Wintchell's. I slowly made my way into the middle of the living room and stood next to Evelyn, looking at everything in the room except the couple standing before me. I barely noticed the look of horror that passed on the couple's face.

"Ms. Mercer, there seems to be a grave misunderstanding." I looked to Evelyn's confused expression.

"I'm sorry what confusion?"

"I'm not sure what the adoption agency told you but… we came here to see Missy." That familiar taste of vomit became very apparent in my mouth as I felt Evelyn's hand on the small of my back. "I mean…well. We were sent files on both Jack and Missy. But…well…we…uh…We were looking for someone who was a bit younger than Jack's age." I finally looked into the man's eyes with a blank expression. "Jack… we hope you understand. But it doesn't make you any less of the fine gentleman you are right now."

"Oh I feel so terrible… This was all of my fault, I obviously misunderstood what the adoption agency was telling me…I…" I stopped Evelyn before she could continue any further.

"No it's ok Evelyn. I understand." I looked back into the eyes of the middle-age couple. "You don't have to sugar coat it for me. I know you don't want me, who the hell would want damaged goods. No body wants a kid with my kind of reputation why would you. You don't have to try and make me feel better about myself all because you don't want to adopt me because I know what I am. I'm nothing but shit on the ground, so let me go get Missy for you okay." After I was done with my ranting I left the three adults in the living room with their jaws hanging open.

What were you thinking Jack? Did you actually think that they would want to adopt you? Come on man. Take your head out of the clouds and stop dreaming of a better life because no one is ever going to want you. All I want to do at that moment was bang my head against the wall for actually having some hope for once. I opened Missy's door and caught her coloring. She looked up at me with curious blue eyes.

"Come on kid, you got some people who are really excited to meet you."

"Is Jack feeling better?" I couldn't help but let out a slight smile.

"I'm feeling much better now, thanks. But you better get downstairs."

The Wintchell's had spent the rest of the night with the family. The three brothers had all seemed to approve of Missy's soon to be parents but all I could do was sit in the corner of the room. I couldn't help but feel a bit envious of Missy's situation but it was over too soon because the following day her things were packed and we all stood outside the house saying our goodbyes. She wouldn't remember us when she grew up. She was much too young to remember any of us. Maybe it was for the better…

The Wintchell's stood by the car smiling as they watched Missy give everyone hugs and kisses. She finally came down to me. There was a moment of awkward silence when I finally bent down on my knees to bring myself to Missy's height.

"Sorry, we didn't have much time to get to know each other better." The next thing I knew she threw her arms around my neck and to my surprise I wrapped my arms around her little body as well. She looked back up to me with tears in her eyes, but they weren't tears of sadness, but tears of joy. I looked into her eyes and wondered how that felt like. To be that happy, to finally have a family, I held back the tears that were trying to come down. I ruffled Missy's hair and gave her a slight chuckle. "You take care now. You finally have a home, you have a lot more luck than me kid." She gave me a strange look and placed her small hands on both sides of my face. Her eyes grew intense as she looked deep into mine.

"Jack, don't you see? You are home." I was left speechless and left to comprehend her message as she ran into the car and gave one last wave to all of us before driving away with her new parents.

God did I need a cigarette.

**Authors Note: So? What do you think? Short I know but hope you all still enjoyed it. You know what to do now. Leave me some feedback PLEASE PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE:) Thanks so much to all of my loyal readers I appreciate each and every one of you.**


	11. Chapter 11

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Awww I'm so glad that ch 10 made you guys want to cry. I mean...not that I wanted you to cry or anything but, it was a very nice thing say,let's just put it that way.Thanks for all the reviews. Hopefully everybody will get to leave me some feeback on this one.Enjoy!**

Chapter 11

I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think straight, my hands wouldn't stop shaking. I gave a low groan and held my stomach. The pack of cigarettes that Logan had given me were long gone and I needed to find something else to replace my cravings before I did something drastic. I sat up in my bed coming to the conclusion that I would never be able to fall asleep and looked at the digital clock on my night stand. 5:40 A.M.

For the past few days I had tried my best to completely detach myself from the rest of the household. It seemed all too quiet since Missy had left. The sweet sound of child's laughter had unconsciously been a comforting sound to me. I got off of my bed and walked to my sock drawer, my feet padding across blue carpet. I took out my toothbrush and headed to the bathroom. Ever since Evelyn had given me the new toothbrush I would always return it to my sock drawer after every use, because every night I would think about leaving, running away. I still hadn't unpacked…I had simply stuffed my duffle bag and whatever else that Evelyn had given me in the sock drawer. It's pathetic to really see how little I really had, all my necessities could fit into a freaking sock drawer.

I ran the cold water over my face and sighed looking into the familiar mirror seeing an unfamiliar face fading away with each passing day. I looked horrible. Withdrawal was taking control of me. I had no more room on my wrist to cut myself that I had resorted to making cuts into my upper thigh. Amazing how depressing it could be without having cocaine in your system.

"You're up early…excited for school?" I turned to see Jeremiah standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. I rolled my eyes and moved passed him making my way downstairs. "Oh what? You still pissed about that night? You know Bobby didn't mean it right? That fight wouldn't have even happened if you had just let him take the coke." I sat at the kitchen table with my head in my hands. "Hey…you okay man?"

"No…"

"What?"

"What do you think? I haven't had anything in my system for the past couple of days. Jesus Christ!" I groaned once again and ran my hands through my hair.

"I know it hurts…but this is a good sign. You have to go through this if you want to get better."

"Since when did anybody care if I got better or not."

"Man you got to give yourself some more credit."

"Think about it Jerry. Honestly would it have made a difference if I had never come back that night or not? I bet you wouldn't have even noticed. You don't even know me." Jeremiah placed his hand on my shoulder and I flinched, but he didn't seem deterred by that.

"How are we supposed to get to know you if you close yourself off to everybody, not to mention that jackass attitude of yours doesn't help either." Easier said than done. "Jack you hungry? I can't cook much but I can make a mean bowl of cereal."

"I'm not hungry."

"You have to eat something man. Have you seen yourself, we gotta put some meat on you boy."

"You talking to your imaginary friend again Jerry?" Bobby became silent as he realized that Jerry was talking to me. I didn't even give him glance, I merely hung my head down. "Jerry."

"Good morning to you to Bobby."

"Jack. How are you today?" I sat there silently. He sighed loudly and walked towards me. I immediately pushed my chair back as far as I could. "Jack I'm not going to hurt you." It was then he grabbed my chin roughly and forced me to look at him. I held on to Bobby's wrist to try and alleviate the pressure on my chin and stared at him once again fearful of what he might do. He seemed to be studying my face carefully with a concerned eye. "Can barely see that bruise anymore…" He then released my chin and walked towards the fridge. "You're fine Jack. Just a small hit, you'll live." I rubbed my chin and watched Bobby and Jerry move about the kitchen pulling out bowls and cups. "Jack, don't try and pull any shit when you're at school today. Angel's going to be there too so don't even try to get out and fuck around with your little friend Logan. Or else…" Well that was comforting, or else.

"Why you gotta go and threaten him like that Bobby. You know that's why he doesn't like you."

"He doesn't like any of us Jerry."

"That doesn't give you any right to be so forceful. He just came out of a rough situation with his other foster family."

"We all came out of fucked up situations Jerry, that's no excuse for him to go around and figuring out ways to get himself killed by some stupid shit." Now I was just getting annoyed by their bickering and how they seemed to talk about me like I wasn't there.

"What am I saying Bobby. You're hopeless."

"Well what do you suggest then? We all try to be nice but the only way he seems to listen or hear anything is if we be a bit rough. It's the only way to get it through his thick skull."

"I'm still here you know." They both stopped their conversation and glanced at me.

"Go put some clothes on Jack, I'll be taking you to school."

"Why you?" Bobby stopped pouring juice in his cup.

"Why not me?"

"Why not Evelyn?"

"She's busy Jackie, she can't be here 24/7 to hold your little hand. Too busy trying to find a family that'll take in your shitty ass." I tried not to let his comment hurt me but it was getting harder and harder for me to pretend like nothing bothered me when in reality everything did.

"Thank you…" Bobby stopped what he was doing and looked at me with curiosity.

"Thank you for what?"

"Thank you for reminding me how worthless I really am." I was just about to leave the kitchen when Bobby grabbed my wrist to stop me.

"Jack I'm…" I let out a small whimper and cringed as Bobby held onto my wrist. He immediately let go and gave me a strange look. Before I could stop him he tore off my wrist band. "Jesus… did you do this to yourself?"

"Let go."

"Just answer the question Jack."

"You wouldn't understand."

"Oh is that right. God damn it Jack. Jerry, go get the fucking first aid kit and you go sit back down at the table."

"No." Why was I acting like this?

"Go sit down."

"I said no. I've been doing this all of my life and I'm telling you now I'm fine."

"Jack get your ass in that seat right now!"

"What are you going to do Bobby if I don't? You going to make me? Well go then. Let's see it." I stood in front of him and gave him a light push on the shoulders. "What are you waiting for tough guy, if you want to hit me then hit me!" I pushed him a little harder this time and he took a step back. "Come on and hit me!" I pushed him again. "Fucking hit me Bobby what the hell are you waiting for!" I punched him in the chest but he still didn't react. "Fucking hit me! That's what they all do! That's what they all did to me!" The tears started pouring out of my eyes as I continued to hit Bobby as hard as I could shouting at the top of my lungs. "Come on Bobby! I'm giving you chance to fucking hit me go for it! Be like all of them! Beat me into the ground and tell me how worthless I am! Beat me into the ground until I can't get up! Pound it into me until I realize what a lost cause I am!" While my ranting Bobby had held onto both of my arms to try and stop the punches I was giving him trying his best to calm me down. Tears continued to come down as I slowly lost the energy to fight against Bobby's strong grip. "Hit me Bobby, please. Make it stop just put me out of my misery…" We both seemed to sink to the ground as he continued to hold onto me. "please…" The next thing I knew I was sobbing into his shoulder.

"I'm not going to hit you Jack. I'm never going to hurt you like they did." I was gasping trying to breath through my sobs.

"I hate my life…"

"Don't say that Jack. Shh…calm down."

"I don't…I don't…want to stay here. Why was I even born?"

"Jack stop. It doesn't always feel like this... you're going through withdrawal. That's why you're feeling so depressed. None of this is real…"

"It's real, it feels so real. I hate it! Just make it stop." Bobby held onto me tightly as I continued to cry on his shoulder. He hadn't hit me, he didn't make one move. Most people would've have thrown me out by now but he was still holding me trying to calm me down. But it was too much, too many emotions, too many painful memories to count. It was all so overwhelming. One had piled up onto another, onto another and it was all finally coming down. "It's just so hard…" My sobs had finally died down into quiet tears as Bobby finally let me go.

"I know Jack. It's always going to be hard, but it gets better, it's going to get better." I sighed loudly and wiped my face with my hands. A tissue was place before me and I looked to find Jerry standing next to me with a box of tissues and the first aid kit in hand.

"I was always too chicken." Jerry and Bobby both gave me an odd look.

"Too chicken about what?"

"I never had the guts to go through with it…you know…killing myself. I had so many opportunities." I looked down at my uncovered wrists stinging from the tears that were falling upon them. "But…I could never bring myself to make a cut deep enough." Bobby slowly rubbed the medicine into the multiple cuts and shook his head.

"Hopefully you'll never find an opportunity ever again."

**Authors Note: So...what did you guys think? I can't tell you enough how inspirational each review is to me. It pushes me to write more for all of my faithful readers. So now that you're done reading, you know what to do. PLEAS PLEASE PLEASE Review! Muah!**


	12. Chapter 12

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Hmmm...didn't get many reviews last chapter so hopefullly this chapter is better. I honestly do believe it's my longest chapter yet...maybe not haha oh well. Thanks to those that did review, Warriora, Romantic Tragedy,and XNegAttentionX (you never let me down!). There is this one part where I talk about Jack's wardrobe if you ever get confused about what I'm talking about watch the movie and look at his jacket's closely. All of his jackets except the leather one has paint splatters all over them. Even the one that he's wearing at the funeral, it's really faint but there are red paint splatters everywhere. Anywho...enjoy!**

Chapter 12

I couldn't bring myself to stop shaking my leg as the car slowly stopped in front of the school. All the kids milling around made me nervous, every new school made me nervous.

"Jack…Jack!"

"What?"

"Here take these." Bobby handed me two little white pills that looked highly questionable.

"Are you trying to kill me Bobby?" He gave me an annoyed look as he threw a water bottle in my lap.

"Would you just take em and shut the hell up."

"What exactly am I taking?"

"Just something to calm your nerves Jackie, believe me it works."

"How do you know I just won't get addicted to these?" He gave me one cold look and I immediately swallowed the pills.

"Hey Jack." I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to see Angel. "Watch your back. There's a lot of shit that goes down around here and if anybody gives you trouble just come find me."

"Little brother…just make sure you bring Jack out of the school in one piece by the time I come pick you up later this afternoon. If he comes home hurt you know ma's just going to kick my ass." Before Bobby and Angel could say anything else I swung the car door open and made my way to the front doors of high school hell. I readjusted my backpack on my shoulder and stuffed my hands deep into the pockets of my black jeans. My black paint splattered hoodie barely enough to ward off the cold winter air of Detroit. I could feel the eyes on me, it felt like everybody was assessing every inch of me, it made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

I took the first few steps on the stairs leading to the entrance of the school when I heard light snickering and laughter. I turned to the side and noticed a group of black kids pointing and laughing at me.

God…I hated high school…

"Well, well will you look at this. Detroit keeps sending its finest white trash to our school. Get a load of this punk here." I guess this was the point where I had to introduce myself. I walked straight up to the large group of black kids and cocked my head to the side staring intently at the guy in particular who had just said the 'white trash' comment. He wasn't too big, I figured if a fight were to happen I would be able to take him, hopefully his friends wouldn't help him out. I glanced to the right to see a girl standing next to him a cigarette between her delicate finger tips. To my advantage, the guys hand was firmly attached to the side of her hip and I decided to do what I did best. Seriously piss some people off and it all started with the girl.

"What's your name?" I spoke softly.

"Don't talk to my gir…"

"Why don't you be a gentleman and let the lady speak for herself." I turned back to the girl standing next to him and gave her a soft smile. A smile that I figured out not too long ago always helped me get what I wanted. "Your name?"

"Amber."

"Amber…may I?" I nodded my head towards the cigarette she was holding and held my hand out. And to everybody else's surprise, except mine, she handed me her cigarette with a slight smile. I took it graciously lightly letting my fingertips brush up against hers and I glanced back at the guy standing next to her. His eyes were filled with anger, so furious that it had made him incapable of speaking. But of course I had to go further. "Hey man… I think your girl just gave the 'white trash' her very own cigarette." I gave him a lopsided grin as I brought the cigarette to my lips. After taking a large puff of the cigarette I blew the smoke I had to exhale right into his face. I ran my tongue across my lips tasting the remaining flavor of Amber's lip gloss on the cigarette. "Mmm…her lips taste like cherries. I'll see you around campus Amber." I put the cigarette back upon my lips and turned back towards the schools entrance. I was waiting for it, I was waiting for someone to tackle me into the ground, but nothing ever came.

Before I let the schools doors close I took a quick glance outside to see if they were following me when I noticed Angel talking to the guy I had just pissed off. I was just about to walk off down the hall when Angel grabbed me by the shoulder.

"Not even one minute out of the car and you're already pissing off the wrong people. Fuck man you can't do whatever you did to Jamal like that. It's only going to lead to violence and violence won't solve anything." Was he kidding me? I rolled my eyes and looked him straight in the eyes.

"Do you seriously believe in what you just said?" Angel stood silently for a moment before answering.

"No but it's what ma would've wanted me to tell you. But still…"

"He called me white trash."

"Oh…well then. Did you get few good licks in?" I smirked.

"I think so."

"Right well…hey. Don't take offense to this or nothing but, don't come and talk to me during school. Only come to me when you seriously need help. Got a reputation to uphold you know."

"Right then. I think I can handle myself Angel so you run along and do whatever the fuck it is that you do." He seemed to smile for a second as he looked beyond my shoulder. My eye brows furrowed at his reaction. "What?"

"Well then Jack. Guess you can handle this one all by yourself." He gave me a pat on the shoulder and walked passed me. "Morning Miss. Jensen."

"Good morning Angel." My shoulder went tense at the sound of the teacher's voice. I heard her clear her throat right behind me and I slowly turned around. She stood a few inches shorter than me, piercing gray eyes, with wavy brown hair, rounded out by a black dress suit. I once again brought the cigarette butt to my lips and took a puff. "What do you think you're doing young man?" I smiled.

"Oh let me guess…my pants too high on my waist for the standards of this school? Or is it my chain? No chains allowed here?"

"We have a no smoking on campus rule here." I frowned and looked down at the cigarette.

"I was hoping you wouldn't say that."

"I suggest you put it out Mr…"

"Bradshaw and you can't make me put it out. It's my only one and I need it to get through the day."

"Aren't you a bit young to be smoking anyways?" She crossed her arms and gave me a questioning look.

"Aren't you a bit too pretty to be a teacher? I mean finding a face like yours in a strip club maybe but here? Why?" She seemed un-phased by my comment.

"Hmm, smoking on campus and disrespecting a teacher. Boy, you're just asking to be sent to the principal's office aren't you Mr. Bradshaw?" I looked down at my wrist pretending to look at a nonexistent watch.

"Wow it's my first day of school and it's only what…7:50 in the morning and I'm already being sent to the principal's office? Now that's a new record even for my standards." I stated sarcastically.

"Put out the cigarette Mr. Bradshaw, now." She said it a bit more sternly this time. I took one last puff and exhaled the smoke in her face just like I had done to Jamal and I gave her a slight smirk.

"If you insist." I dropped it to the ground and stomped on it for good measure.

"Don't let me catch you smoking on campus again Mr. Bradshaw and you might want to ease off on the smart talk. Not all teachers are as lenient as I am. I'd hate to see a new student spend their first few weeks here in detention. Welcome to Detroit City High School." She turned and went on her way. I sighed and readjusted my backpack and went to the office.

"I'm here to pick up my schedule." The old lady at the front desk slowly brought her eyes to meet mine.

"Name please."

"Jack Bradshaw."

"Jack Bradshaw…Jack Bradshaw. Ah yes your one of Evelyn's boys."

"No more like a temporary project."

"She called in not too long ago to make sure you came."

"You're shitting me." She seemed taken a back by my words. I chuckled under my breath when I heard her quietly cursing the Mercer family and how each son was too unruly or what not. She handed me my schedule without a second glance. I shook my head when suddenly I stumbled to the ground nearly landing on my face. I looked down at the ground to see what had caused it when I saw a pair of legs stretched out in front of the doorway. "What the fuck!" The boy sitting in the chair, with a grin on his face, put his arms behind his head.

"Woops, my bad." I wasn't in the mood for another confrontation so I decided to just ignore him. It seemed that Bobby's drugs were having some effect on me, at least I hadn't attacked him. Grumbling under my breath I made my way through the crowded hallway already dreading the rest of the day.

I had almost thought the day would go off without a hitch when I ran into the most unexpected person.

It was almost sixth period and I was completely lost. I had no idea where the hell I was going and the second bell had just wrung announcing the commencement of class. The halls were empty now and I still had no idea where I was. I turned another corner when I noticed a girl opening her locker to get some books. Since I really had no idea where I was I decided to ask for some directions.

"Uh excuse me I seem to be lost. I was wondering if you could help…" My jaw dropped when she turned around to look at me.

"Jack?" We both stood there in shock unable to move or say anything. It must have been another three minutes before she threw her arms around my neck to give me a hug. "Oh my god Jack…I was so worried about you. I'm so glad you're safe, thank god you're okay." I wrapped my arms around her body and picked her up to give her a proper hug. Her feet were dangling inches off of the floor as I continued to hold on to her. I dug my face into her hair and the familiar smell of strawberries and vanilla swept over me.

At that moment I didn't know if I was supposed to cry out of sadness or cry out of sheer joy for finally being able to see her. I could feel her tears staining my sweater but I didn't care. "Jaime…I missed you so much…"

Authors Note: So? What did you think? Hope it wasn't too much of a cliff hanger haha! Hoped you enjoyed it, now you know what you have to do. PLEASE REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!


	13. Chapter 13

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Thanks to all that reviewed! Keep it coming!**

Chapter 13

I set her down to the ground and lightly brushed her tears away from her pale cheeks when I noticed something. She tried to hide her face behind her hair but I knew what it was. I pulled her hair back and let it settle behind her ear so I could get a better look at her and what I saw only made my blood boil.

"It's really not that bad…" I touched the bruised cheek lightly and tore my hands away when she flinched.

"Like fuck it isn't." She sighed with exasperation.

"Can't I just be happy to see you?"

"Look what he's doing to you. How come you haven't called the police or something?"

"On my own father?"

"Why not?" She shook her head at me.

"I could never do that…not on my own dad."

"You don't have a right to call the cops on your own dad but he has a right to beat you like this?" Jaime threw her hands up in the air and sighed…again.

"Jack he didn't beat me all right I just…"

"Oh what? You just chose to put your face in front of your dad's fist?" I could see the tears brimming her eyes, she was trying so hard to stay strong, to stay optimistic. But situations like these always ended the same…unhappy.

"Hey kids! You two have a hall pass." I looked over my shoulder and rolled my eyes.

"Would you please fuck off mister we're trying to have a private conversation."

"Jack stop. I'm sorry Mr. Henderson, he's new here. He was just asking me for some directions."

"Is that so?" The old man gave us a skeptical look through his glasses. "Ms. Grover, you're never one to be late for class." Now I was just seriously getting annoyed.

"Look we'll go to class in a minute just give us a freaking second."

"That's no way to speak to a…"

"Oh kiss my ass old timer. Got waste someone else's time." Jaime put a hand on my arm.

"Jack seriously. It's your first day." My brows furrowed and I gave her a look of concern.

"We need to talk."

"Is there a problem here Mr. Henderson?" I looked over my shoulder again. I cursed under my breath.

"You gotta be fucking kidding me."

"Jack, that's the principal. Just…calm down."

"I am calm." I could already feel myself grinding my teeth.

"Yes, Mr. Jackson, in fact there is a problem. This boy here has been keeping Jaime from class and he told me to…well…you get the idea."

"Young man." I let go of Jaime's hand and turned around.

"The names Jack Bradshaw." I shoved my hands into my pockets and stared straight into the eyes of my principal. The tall black male grinned as he clasped his hands behind his back.

"Ah…Mr. Bradshaw, I haven't had the pleasure of meeting you yet, unfortunate that it has to be under these circumstances. Is it true, what Mr. Henderson just said?" Before I could say anything Jaime jumped in.

"No Mr. Jackson it was nothing like that." She took a step in front of me in a way trying to protect from what was about to turn into a visit to the office. "Jack wasn't keeping me from anything. Like I said to Mr. Henderson, he was lost. I just happen to be out here cause I forgot my books from my locker, I was just helping him find his way."

"But that still doesn't account for the fact that he did disrespect a faculty member."

"Oh please, he needs to get thicker skin if he's offended by what I said to him." Jaime snapped her head to give me a glare before turning back around to the principal. "Look, I was just trying to talk to her okay, he disrupted me."

"You can do the talking after class Mr. Bradshaw But when the bell rings it means, if you didn't know, that all students need to be in class." I tried to take a step towards him but Jaime held me back.

"It was something important."

"More important than education?" I gave a giggle despite my better judgment.

"Don't give me that shit. You're the principal in one of the worst fucking high schools in the entire god damn city."

"Jack stop…" Jaime put her hand on my shoulder to try to calm me down, I was pretty sure it wasn't going to work.

"Who the fuck are you to tell me that education is important? You aren't doing shit for this school." Mr. Jackson just stood there taking in my verbal abuse.

"Jack!"

"I was just trying to have a fucking conversation before this saggy ass decided to interrupt me. I was going to go to class, but no!"

"Jaime…I think it's time you head to class." Mr. Jackson said sternly. Jaime looked between me and her principal before quietly making her way down the hall.

"Jaime! I'll meet you outside after school. Don't leave without talking to me!" When I turned back to Mr. Jackson he had a cool, calm demeanor surrounding him.

"You know, it's students like you that cause student's like Jaime to fail."

"Cause her to fail? Me? You have no idea who I am so don't even think about questioning my motives you prick." That seemed to be his last straw.

"Jack…to my office now."

Later in the day…

Sitting outside of the principal's office on my first day of school had to be a record. I didn't even really understand why I was there. Okay, maybe I did but I really didn't think it was a good enough reason to get in trouble for. I was drumming my thumbs on the armrests of my chair when the main office doors opened to reveal Bobby. My heart sank, I was hoping it was going to be Evelyn. He glared at me from across the room and walked straight past me into Mr. Jackson's office. It was about ten minutes later when he came back out. I sat in the chair silently finding the floor to be extremely interesting to look at.

"Let's go." I stood on my feet and walked beside him when he suddenly stopped. "I got to give to you Cracker Jack. Already busted on the first day of school? I give you props." He gave me a pat on the shoulder and started walking again. I closed my mouth from the shock of trying to comprehend what Bobby had just said to me.

"Wait…you're not mad?"

"For what? Talking shit to a teacher? Naw man. I don't blame you, teachers are dicks, I used to do it all the time. In fact, I just told your principal off right now, he and I are old pals." He stopped in mid stride once again and looked at me. "Of course, if I find out you're in his office for any other reason like…drugs or you being in a fight…I won't be so lenient."

"Right." I was beginning to understand Bobby. He didn't seem as bad as I had thought him to be. We stepped outside the schools hall and I shivered as the winter wind sliced through my thin hoodie. Bobby and I tried to weave our way through the crowd of students when I saw Jaime walking towards the street. Now or never.

"Jaime!." I pushed through the crowd trying to get to her. "Jaime!" She seemed to be speed walking, making an attempt to get away from me. "Jaime! Wait up!" She was so close, I was just about to grab her hand to stop her when I felt a cold hand wrap itself around my neck and throw me down onto the snow covered ground. I could hear the ringing in my ears from the impact of my head hitting the ground, I groaned in pain rubbing my neck in the process. I finally opened my eyes to see who it was…Paul. I was so distracted with the need to get to Jaime and hadn't even noticed Paul come out of his car.

"Well well Jaime! Looks like you got yourself a stalker." All the horrible memories started flashing before my eyes. "I was wondering where you ran off to Jack. I was all worried, no, actually…I was hoping you were dead in a gutter somewhere." Before I could do anything to protect myself he kicked me hard in the stomach, I immediately curled up in a ball from the pain.

"Dad stop! Just leave him alone. You have me! You have me dad! Leave him alone!" Her words didn't seem to affect him as he grabbed me by the collar.

"You sick bastard. She's your own fucking daughter…how could you do that to her." He then punched me in the face and threw me up against his car. I braced myself for the next punch that I knew was coming my way when I was suddenly dropped to the ground. I cracked my eye open to see Bobby bending Paul's arm backwards.

"Don't fucking touch him!" I couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction as I watched Bobby punch Paul's nose only to hear a sickening crunch. "Don't even think about coming near him again or else I'll come and finish the job." He threw Paul to the ground and grabbed me. "Come on Jack. Let's get you home." I tried my best to stop.

"Wait…I need…need to talk…Jaime."

"Calm down Jack. Your head hit the ground pretty hard when he threw you."

"No you don't understand he…" I shook my head trying to get rid of the sense of dizziness. "He…" I hadn't told Bobby about the Grover's yet. In fact, Bobby really had no idea who he had just hit, but he hit him pretty good…for me. I looked over my shoulder to see Jaime helping Paul off the ground. I saw her glance towards me beneath her hooded gaze. I needed to help her.

**Authors Note: I'm really trying to decide where to take the story from here. I really want to get into all the good stuff but I have to figure out ways to connect them all together. Thanks for being so patient. You all you liked chapter 13 little on the short side I know. But hopefully you still enjoyed it. Now you know what to do...REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**


	14. Chapter 14

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: I KNOW! It's been a while since I last update...I apologize profusely to all of my readers. Summer school sucks and now it's almost done so I'm going to have more time to write. Hopefully this chapter will meet all of your standards. Thanks to all the reviews! I was very very happy to see all the reviews from the last chapter and I hope it'll only increase after this one. Each and every review counts because its what keeps me writing. So now finally...ENJOY!**

Chapter 14

"Ow!" I cringed as Evelyn touched the bruise on my cheek.

"Now how did this happen?" I sat there silently as she continued to inspect my face. "You're not going to tell me?"

"No." She shook her head silently and went to the freezer to retrieve an ice pack.

"You know one of these days Jack you're going to have to trust me. You're going to have to come to the realization that nothing is going to happen to you here. I would never let anything bad happen to you." She placed the ice pack on my cheek and left me in the kitchen alone. I let out a breath of air and sighed in frustration. God knows what Paul could be doing to Jaime right now. I felt completely helpless unable to do anything for Jaime. She saved my life, the least I could do was save hers in return. No one should ever suffer through what I had to suffer through growing up, especially her. Bobby walked in soon after rubbing his knuckles which seemed to have its own bit of bruising.

"So…Jack…who the hell did I punch back there."

"What?"

"Jack, don't play stupid. I don't have the patience. I nearly broke my fist punching this guy for you and I deserve a fucking explanation." He sat down with a grim look on his face staring intently into my eyes. I looked down at my hands finding them extremely interesting at the moment.

"Did you tell Evelyn anything?" Of course he did stupid it's his freaking mom.

"No."

"No? Why not?" I can't say that I was expecting Bobby to not say anything. I honestly figured he would rat me out, but it seemed to me that I had Bobby figured out all wrong.

"It's not my story to tell. But you are going to tell me why that man was trying to beat the shit out of you." I bit my lip and closed my eyes. I really didn't want to say anything. Why couldn't he just let me handle my own crap?

"It was just a misunderstanding."

"Jack…"

"It was nothing."

"You're going keep playing this game?"

"Bobby I have no idea what you're talking about." There was a moment of silence.

"You're so full of shit Jack. You're going to want someone's help one day and if you keep it up like this when you need help the most you're going to be alone. Now I'm asking you because for some strange reason I'm feeling generous and I want to help you out. It's up to you. But don't come back to me one of these days all beat up and expect me to feel sorry for you." He stood to leave. But you can't let him leave Jack. He's being honest with you, just tell him… But it's such a hard story to tell.

"Do you have a cigarette?" Bobby turned around towards me a questioning look in his eyes.

"What?"

"I said do you have a cigarette?"

"Jack I don't think you are in any position to try and negotiate here."

"If you give me a cigarette I'll tell you something. Could you at least give me that much. I've had a very difficult day. You have no idea how stressful high school is." Bobby rolled his eyes and walked out the kitchen door only to walk back in a minute later with a pack of cigarettes and a lighter in his hands.

"You have to swear on your life that you will not tell ma that I gave you a cigarette."

"Yeah, yeah hand them over." I removed the ice pack from my now numb cheek and set it on the kitchen table happily taking the cigarettes like they were candy. I was just about to light the sweet cancer stick when the lighter was slapped out of my hand. I was taken aback for a second before I realized the lighter was on the floor. "Did…did you just slap my hand?"

"Ma would kill you if she saw you smoking in her kitchen."

"So you slapped my hand?"

"If you want to smoke we have to go outside. Come on."

"Well you could've just told me instead of slapping me."

"Oh I'm sorry Jackie poo did I hurt you?"

"No…but you slap like a girl."

"Come on Jack, like you even know what a girls slap feels like. I bet you've never gotten a slap from a girl let alone been with one." What was he insinuating… This constant teasing was something that I have yet to become used to and it was annoying the hell out of me.

"Hey I've…"

"Yeah yeah Jack. I really have no interest in your non-existent sex life now get your ass outside!" I growled in frustration and stormed outside with cigarettes in tow. I stood on the back porch with a cigarette hanging from my mouth trying furiously to get the lighter to work when Bobby took it out of my hand and easily lit my cigarette. After the first puff I could immediately feel the effects of the nicotine in my body. "So?"

"So what?" I glanced at Bobby and continued to take another drag.

"Are you going to tell me what went down back there or am I going to have to shoot the whole neighborhood down." It was now or never.

"Her name is Jaime."

"Wait wait, all of this is about a girl?" I looked at him quizzically and shook my head.

"No!"

"Oh god Jack. Is the girl knocked up with your baby?" I choked on my own saliva at the total absurdity of the question.

"What? God no!"

"Well then what the hell is it?"

"Stop shouting at me Jesus. Would just calm down for a second so I can tell you."

"This is me calm!" I sighed and took another deep drag on the cigarette.

"That guy that hit me…He was my foster parent before I came here. Jaime is his daughter."

"So why did he hit you?"

"Because it's his fetish. Geez I don't know Bobby he's just some sick guy that thinks that h…"

"What?"

"Nothing. Just know that some bad shit went down between me and him and since I left he's been doing it to his daughter. Or so I think. I was just trying to talk to her when he attacked me."

"What shit went down?"

"Some shit Bobby! This isn't fucking Oprah I'm not going to spill my life story to you so would you stop with the interrogation."

"So that's it then. That's all you're going to tell me?" I threw the cigarette in the snow and turned to face him.

"That's all you need to know."

"What are you so afraid of? Why can't you just tell me?"

"This is my problem Bobby. Let me handle it. It's my fucking life." I was just about to leave when he grabbed my arm. "Let go of me."

"Don't complicate your own life by making it worse for yourself. Don't you think you've had enough? I may not know what you're planning to do but don't be stupid and do something rash." I smirked and pulled my arm free.

"But Bobby…I only learn from the best." I gave him a hard pat on his shoulder and walked inside. I had to think of something fast, before it could get worst. It was my fault after all.

**Authors Note: So? What do you think? I know it's a bit on the short side but I promise something exciting will come up. Hope you all liked it after such a long wait. Now you know what to do PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! Muah!**


	15. Chapter 15

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: THANKS SO MUCH for all the reviews! After getting so many I decided to quickly write the next chapter. I told you, you wouldn't have to wait long. I hope I get a good of a response as last time. Now please enjoy chapter 15!**

Chapter 15

A week had already passed by and I have yet to have made any progress in Operation Save Jaime. Mostly because of the fact that all she ever did when she saw me walking in the hall was run the opposite direction. Now being the type of guy that I am I was pretty aggressive in ways to try and talk to her but people didn't look too highly of me after they found me in the girl's locker room chasing after her. If things couldn't get any worse there was a rumor going around school that I was some perverted freak who got off raping women in the girl's locker room…yeah…enough said. I've considered going back to her house but I felt it was too risky, I might put her in more danger by just coming around.

I sat at my desk humming along to some tune that was stuck in my head when the door opened.

"Ever heard of knocking?"

"You better get used to it. Me and my brothers have a strict no knocking policy even if you're taking a shit." I turned to see Angel sprawled out on my bed.

"What do you want?" I sighed.

"So…you really get off raping girls in the girl's locker room?" I crumpled the paper that I was doodling on and threw it at him.

"Do you always believe everything you hear?" Angel caught the paper easily and threw it right back in my face.

"Hey man…this is Detroit. Shit like that really goes down around here." I rolled my eyes in complete shock of his lack of common sense.

"No it's not true. Now get the hell out of my room."

"Naw it's okay. I like it here just fine."

"Don't you have something to do like…I don't know play house with Bobby?" Angel chuckled lightly and sat up running his hand over his shaved head.

"He's out."

"Doing what?"

"Setting someone on fire I guess I don't know. Hey you think I'd look good with an afro?"

"What?"

"You know an afro. You think it would make me look sexy?"

"I'm not going to answer that." A moment of silence passed when I questioned him again. "One night I saw Bobby come in with blood on his hands."

"Yeah so what?" Angel once again made himself comfortable setting his head on my pillow stretching his long body out over the length of my bed.

"What do you mean so what? Are you meaning to say that he goes around beating people up?"

"When the occasion calls for it. Yeah. Maybe even kill people if a situation gets that bad." I was just about to make a remark when suddenly the door opened again.

"Jack? Oh hello Angel." Evelyn stood in the doorway, hands clasped and smiling. "Jack? Working hard on your homework?"

"Uh…" I looked down at my desk which only had a pencil on top and immediately started digging through my backpack pulling out a textbook and opening it. "Yep."

"Could you show a little bit more effort Jack?" I looked at Evelyn and shrugged when Angel chimed in.

"Yeah, a little bit more effort Jack?" I glared at him out of the corner of my eye as he continued to snicker.

"Hush Angel." Angel's smile disappeared as he continued to sit on the bed. "Would you like to help me with dinner Jack?"

"God no." I don't know why she had this affect on me but she did. It's like she demanded respect out of me even though I really didn't want to give it. She had a way of just commanding me. "I mean…do I have to?"

"Of course not dear, Angel can help me."

"What?" The look on his face was priceless as he was dragged out of my room. I quickly shut the door. Silence…thank goodness. When I suddenly heard a tapping on my window, I looked to see who it was when I realized it was Logan. I opened the window and he quickly came inside brushing off the snow flakes still clinging to his coat.

"Is that Bobby dude here right now?" I shook my head and Logan let out a sigh of relief. "Good. How you holding up man?"

"I'm fine." I noticed him shuffling his feet and I knew something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?"

"What? Nothing…nothing is wrong."

"Stop with the lying Logan you suck at it. Now just tell me what's on your mind." I sat back on my bed and watched Logan pace back and forth .

"I…don't know how to tell you this. It's about Jaime." My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. Oh god…was I too late? Did she finally get killed?

"What about her?"

"Well…I…."

"SPIT IT OUT!"

"I saw her the other day and she didn't look too good. I mean…worse than what I've already seen." I immediately pulled my leather jacket on and started climbing out of the window.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going to go get her." Logan soon followed.

"And how the hell do you intend to do that. Fucking kidnap her?"

"If that's what I have to do." I landed on the snowy ground and started to make my way to the Grover's.

"Don't be stupid Jack! He has a fucking shotgun. He kills squirrels with it and believe me he's a pretty good shot, I've seen him! Jack! Stop!" Logan grabbed a hold of my shoulder but I merely pushed him away.

"Don't you understand? I've already waited too long. What if something worse happens to her!" I could feel the adrenaline kicking in as I slowly let my emotions take control.

"Jesus Jack! Don't try and be the hero! There's a lot more rational ways of handling this. We can tell the cops."

"You honestly think the cops actually give a fuck about another abuse case?" The cold wind of the night air bit my skin as I continued to trudge through the snow as fast as I could with my now soaked chucks.

"Jack…Jack!" Logan's shouts seemed distant as the world around me seemed to disappear. All I could see was my one destination.

**Authors Note: Don't be mad haha. I hope you all liked this chapter. Please please please leave feedback!**


	16. Chapter 16

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Sorry folks for the lack of updates but I hope you're all still with me. It's kind of short, sorry again. But hopefully you'll still enoy it!**

Chapter 16

I stood in front of her window and peeked in. Her room was dark and her bed was empty.

"Jack! This is crazy! Come down now before he catches you!" I looked down from the terrace and saw Logan standing next to the tree refusing to climb up with me.

"Then leave Logan. I never asked for you to come." That's when I heard it. The shouts, they seemed to be just outside her bedroom door. I quickly moved to the side of her window and heard the door slam shut. Okay Jack, now or never. I tapped the window lightly. That's when I saw her. She slowly approached the window with a tear streaked face. Once she saw me she shook her head firmly. "Jaime…open the window."

"Jack, you shouldn't be here. Just leave."

"I'm going to get you out of here but you're going to have to open the window." She let out a sigh and slowly opened the window. She quickly wiped her tears and turned away from my touch. "Jaime, you can come stay with me all right. You don't have to stay here anymore."

"It's not that easy Jack. He's my father, I can't just leave him."

"Yes you can."

"No! God Jack… You wouldn't understand okay." I sighed out of frustration and looked at her straight in the eyes.

"So you'd rather stay here and let your dad beat you. You know what he did to me while I was here. Sooner or later it's going to get worse."

"Jack I…"

"Jaime that night you helped me, let me please do the same for you."

"I…" My heart started beating faster when I heard his familiar footsteps climbing up the stairs. "Jack you have to go." I grabbed her hand just as she was about to pull away.

"No, I'm not leaving without you!"

"Jack go! Please you don't know what he'll do."

"Jaime wait!"

"No Jack. Just go!" She pulled her hand free from my grip and quickly closed the window and locked it. Just then the door burst open with an extremely drunk Paul standing in the doorway. My hands immediately went to the window and I pulled with all my strength to get it open but it wouldn't budge. I watched helplessly as Paul grabbed Jaime by the hair and pulled her out of the room.

"Jack! What's going on?"

"Logan, go get help. I have to go in and get her."

"What? Don't be stupid Jack!" I ran my hands through my hair knowing that I was quickly running out of time.

"Logan! I don't have time to fucking explain just go get help!" And just like that I went to the window and let my foot hit the glass. The shattered glass was the least of my worries as I climbed through the now broken window. I quickly ran into the hallway and followed the sounds of the screaming. I realized it was coming from downstairs and looked around me to find the nearest weapon.

I held the glass vase closely to my chest as I slowly made my way down the stairs into the living room. This is it Jack…now or never. I was horrified by what I saw. Paul's body was sprawled on top of Jaime trying his best to undress his daughter for god knows what. I could feel my blood boil, all I could see was red and with blinding anger and disgust I smashed the vase on top of his head as hard as I could causing it to shatter into hundreds of pieces. I immediately shoved his body off of Jaime and held her closely through her sobs.

"Well, well…" Paul slowly stood wiping away the blood that was running from his head. "If it isn't Jack back to fuck things up again."

"What the fuck is wrong with you? She's your fucking daughter you sick shit!" All he could do was laugh through his drunken stupor and sway back and forth.

"Well if you had stayed around Jackie boy I wouldn't have to be doing things to her now would I? So it's technically all your fault. You're causing her all this pain you no good son of bitch!" And that's when it happened. It felt surreal, like everything was in slow motion, I felt like I had no control over my body and what it was doing. All I could do was bring my fist up and down on Paul's face, I was barely aware of Jaime screaming stop. It was an adrenaline rush and for the first time in my life I felt the pure pleasure in causing someone else pain.

Meanwhile….

The knock on the door was non-stop and Bobby swore to himself if they didn't stop soon he would shoot whoever it was bothering him so late at night. But his annoyance soon came to halting crash when he opened the door to an extremely panicked Logan.

"Bobby…I…"

"Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"Bobby its... I…shit!"

"Spit it out kid."

"Jack."

"What about Jack?"

"I tried to stop him, I swear I did. But he didn't listen. He never listens." Bobby could already feel the sweat in his palms.

"Where's Jack?"

"I told him not to go. I told him he was going to get himself killed."

"Where the fuck is Jack?"

"He's at the Grover's."

"The Grover's?"

"It's where he was at before he came here. He wanted to take Jaime out, just like she took him out."

"Wait…Jaime?" It was then Bobby realized who it was. It was the girl he had briefly seen when he had gone to pick up Jack from school. "Take me to him now."

**Authors Note: So? What did you guys think? You know what to do now. Please please please leave me some feedback! I appreciate each review!**


	17. Chapter 17

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: I know I know, it's been a while. But thanks for all those who left a review. You guys are totally awesome for sticking by my side with this story. Here's another short yet exciting chapter hopefully! Enjoy!**

Chapter 17

I heard a loud crunch as I brought my fist down to his face for what seemed to be the hundredth time. I could feel his warm blood slick upon my rounded fist as I came at his face with another blow.

"Stop! Jack, please stop!" I could hear Jaime's distant cries but I was in a trance. It was payback. This man before me had to pay. He had to pay for all that he had done, to me, to Jaime, and to any other poor human being that was unfortunate enough to cross Paul's path.

"Doesn't feel so nice when you're on the other side of the fist does it Paul? You pathetic excuse for a human being!" I felt hands upon my shoulders. It was Jaime.

"Please Jack stop! That's enough! Stop you're going to kill my father!" I pushed her away and she fell hard upon the wooden floor. I didn't mean to do it, but I had to protect her. I had to. I couldn't let him touch her.

That was about the time I felt hands upon my shoulders again. Only this time they were larger, firm, strong enough to throw me off of Paul. I went tumbling backwards onto the floor suddenly aware of my surrounding. I could feel the sweat dripping down my forehead and looked around the room to see Jaime crying hysterically, Logan's eyes wide open, and Bobby staring in shock from me to the still body of Paul lying on the ground. I took large gulps of air trying refill my lungs with oxygen. It wasn't long before I realized what I had done. I looked down at my bloodied hands and immediately felt regret.

"Jack…what did you do?" Bobby asked calmly.

"I…I…was…I…" Bobby grabbed a hold of my shoulders and looked straight into my eyes.

"Jack, what the fuck just happened here? Why were you beating that man up?"

"I…" I looked to my right and saw Jaime holding Paul's head in her lap crying. I felt my mouth go dry when the realization of what I had just done hit me like a ton of bricks.

"Jaime…Jaime I…" I loosened Bobby's grip on my shoulders and slowly made my way towards Jaime. I brought out my hand to touch her but she flinched. I felt my heart drop. "Jaime he was going to hurt you. I…I was just trying to help."

"Don't you see Jack…" She stated quietly through her tears. "You couldn't stop could you? You had to do this to him just like he did to you."

"Jaime I'm sorry, I…" I stepped forward but all she did was back away farther from me.

"Don't touch me. Don't put your hands on me." I watched helplessly as she wiped the blood off of her father's forehead and that's when I heard it. It was barely above a whisper but I knew that she had wanted me to hear it. "You are just like him." I felt like the walls were about to cave in on me. I hadn't meant for it to go that far. Had I killed him? I had never killed a man before. I looked down at my bloodied hands once more about to pass out when another pair of hands came into view. It was Bobby's.

He cautiously wiped the blood from my hands on to his sweater and lightly brushed the drops of blood on my face with his calloused hands. "You're gonna be okay Jackie." The distant sounds of sirens could be heard and the familiar acidic taste of vomit began to permeate my mouth. "Hey!" Bobby shook my shoulder and looked straight into my eyes. "Everything is going to be okay Jack. It's all right. When they come don't say anything okay Jack?"

"Bobby…I didn't mean…I was just…fuck."

"Hey!" He shook me again. "We don't' have a lot of time! Now when they come you don't say anything to them okay. Just keep quiet. I'm gonna take care of all of this okay. Now go stand over there next to your friend." I silently nodded as he wiped the last of the blood off of my hands and leather jacket. "Hey girlie! That goes for you to. Go stand over there." She did as she was told and to my horror Bobby stood over the Paul's body just as the police broke down the door.

"Freeze Mercer! Step away from the body!" I could only imagine what it looked liked from the cops perspective. There he was, The Bobby Mercer standing over a beaten body with blood on his hands and sweater, the very blood he wiped away off of me. Bobby looked at me one last time with slight nod of the head slowly raised both of his hands in the air.

"It's about time you boys came. Green! Long time no see!" I tried not to squirm under Green's stare as he walked passed me.

"What are the kids doing here Bobby?" He cringed as the other policemen bent his arms in order to cuff him.

"The kids? Nothing Green, they were just trying to do there duty as good citizens of Detroit to stop me from killing this guys ass." Green sighed and turned to me.

"Jack… Is this true?" I shoved my hands in my pockets and ignored his question.

"Hey! I just told you they were trying to stop me!"

"I want to hear from Jack Bobby. Jack, did you really try to stop him."

"Jack!" I glanced at Bobby with desperation. I was torn.

"Take him to the police car now!" I watched helplessly as they dragged Bobby out. "You got something to say to me Jack, then say it right now." I ran my hand through my hair and shuffled my feet. I suppose I had to do what I did best.

"Fuck you Green." His mouth formed a thin line and he shook his head.

"Well all right then. I'm going to need statements from each of you and that includes you Jack. I don't know what happened here and whether or not you want to talk, you will tell me the truth before this night's over. I know who's house this is and I know who that man is lying on the ground." It was all he said before he walked out the door.

Authors Note: So...What do you guys think? I'll try and update as soon as I can with the next chapter. Please please please leave feedback!


	18. Chapter 18

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: It' s been a while since I've updated and I've got to say thank you to all of those who left reviews in the last chapter. I can't tell you how greatful I am. Hopefully you'll enjoy this very overdue chapter. Enjoy!!**

Chapter 18

"What's the diagnosis?" Green looked in the ambulance and grimaced.

"Surprisingly nothing too bad, he's got a broken nose, a concussion, and a couple cuts that a few stitches can't fix up. I'd say Mercer went a bit easy on him don't you?"

"Not likely." The medic shrugged his shoulders and sighed.

"Well, if you swing by the hospital later on today or tomorrow he should come around. You can ask him what happened yourself."

_Police Station_

"He was pissed cause he came home to see me fucking his daughter." Bobby grinned under the harsh light.

"Are you going to tell me the truth?" Green sighed rubbing his eyes.

"What the fuck do you think I've been telling you these past two hours?"

"Bobby you've given me about seven different versions."

"The first three were the right ones but since you don't believe me, what's the point? Like I said 5 billion times already, I'm not sorry for what I did to that guy. He fucking deserved it."

"And Jack?"

"Jack's got nothing to do with it."

"Is that so?"

"Have you seen the kid Green? He can't even hurt a fly. Plus…can't imagine a little dude like that can pack a punch big enough to create as much damage as I gave the fucker." A moment of silent passed as Green rubbed his forehead in frustration.

I sat outside the interrogation room twiddling my thumbs as I looked across the hallway to see Jaime.

"Dude…what's going to happen?"

"I don't know." I sighed loudly.

"You think we're going to go to jail?"

"I don't know."

"You think they're going to take Bobby away?"

"Logan I don't fucking know! Jesus."

"You don't have to shout. None of this shit would've happened if you had just listened to me in the first place!" I turned to Logan and glared.

"What the hell was I supposed to do? If I didn't go maybe she could've died."

"Maybe she wouldn't have died. Fuck Jack! What were you thinking when you did that to him?" I punched him in the side and watched as he grunted and held his side in pain.

"Shut up." I looked around me to make sure there were no cops around. "Just shut up okay? Bobby will figure it out." That's when I heard Logan giggle slightly.

"You actually think he gives a shit about you? You just met him, he's going to dump all of this on your ass."

"No…he won't."

"Ha, what makes you say that?"

"He told me not to worry."

"And you believe him Jack? How many foster homes have you come from yet you still can't see through all of their bull."

"I have to believe him Logan…I have to."

"Whatever man." Logan turned away from me.

"Logan…you're not going to tell…"

"Jack, I'm not a sellout. I'm just one hell of a good friend even though I think you can be stupid as shit sometimes."

"Thanks." I turned my attention once again to Jaime. She sat in front of me in an almost catatonic state staring off into space.

"Jaime? Jaime…" I tried my best to get her attention but it seemed of no use. "Jaime…I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me…Jaime?" There was a glimmer of desperation in my voice.

"Jaime." I saw Green standing in the hallway looking at me. "I need to speak to you." I turned away trying my best to avoid Green's stare. I quickly stood from my seat to say one last thing. I bent down on my knees so that I could face her.

"Jaime." I gently placed my hands on hers. "Whatever you decide to tell them…I understand. But know that what I did came from a good place." She looked at me just then and my heart felt like it was about to break all over again. I stood once again to leave but Jaime held my hand tightly. I turned to look at our hands clasped together.

"Goodbye Jack." I didn't understand but before I could say anything else Green began pulling Jaime into another room.

An hour had passed and Jaime still hadn't come out of the room. I held my stomach trying to settle the queasy feeling I was getting.

"Fuck…" I ran my hands through my hair a couple of times and started to pace.

"Would you sit down Jack? You're making yourself look suspicious." Logan grabbed my sweater and pulled me back down on the bench.

"How did it get like this?"

"Haven't you ever heard if you keep shaking your leg you're going to shake all the luck out of you." I rolled my eyes.

"Oh like I've been so lucky in my life."

"Hey man…you're not dead."

"I'd be luckier if I were." I chocked back the tears that so desperately wanted to come out and tried my best to think of the better things in life, but it all seemed so distant. What if I had actually killed Paul, what if Bobby gets sent to jail because of what I did, what if Jaime gets sent into the foster care system, what if Jaime never speaks to me again…what if.

"Holy shit. Jack!" Logan grabbed my arm and pointed down the hallway. I looked to where he was pointing and found Bobby coming towards me. I quickly stood from my seat and stared with wide eyes.

"Let's get the fuck out of here Jackie. Grab your friend."

"What? Why? How?"

"Not now Jack. Let's just take the damn opportunity while we still have it."

"I don't get it…you weren't charged or anything?"

"Must've been something the girl said. Whatever let's just bail."

"But Jaime."

"Jack! Not now!" I tensed as I saw Bobby's hands curl up into fists and immediately fell instep with him. I looked back one last time to see the door through which Jaime was taken and prayed to God that everything would be okay.

**Authors Note: Sorry it's so short but hopefully you guys still enjoyed. You know what to do now! Leave feedback PLEASE! Hugs and kisses!**


	19. Chapter 19

Measures of My Life: Jack Mercer

**Authors Note: Hey guys!! Hope you are all having happy holidays! I got so many reviews from the last chapter I hope that continues. Thanks for all that reviewed and thanks to all my loyal readers. It's cause of you that I even bother to continue with this story. It's been a while so I hope you enjoy the new chapter. Sorry for the long wait. **

Chapter 19

I cautiously hung my jacket as Bobby slammed the door behind him. I could feel the tension in the air heighten as Bobby swore under his breath. I really didn't mean for it to all get out of control as it did. I still didn't even know what was going to happen to Jaime. What did she say exactly…

"A lot of shit you put me into Jack." I merely hung my head low acting like a puppy with his tail in between his legs.

"Bobby, I really didn't mean…" He cut me off before I could even say sorry to him.

"Shut the fuck up Jack! I am doing everything in my power not to punch you right now." I watched him out of the corner of my eye as he threw his jacket on the living room couch and ran his hands through his hair. "I don't know why they let me go. She may have just bought us some time, for all I know she could be spilling the beans right now."

"No! No she would never do that."

"You don't know her Jack! Get it through your little pathetic brain alright! You just fucked up the father of daddy's little girl and stupidly I just took the blame. Now I don't know what happened to you before you got here but I'm just going to assume you had a closer relationship to her father than you did with her. So don't fucking tell me that you know her so well that she won't be willing to sell us out! You know…I knew I had a bad feeling about you the moment you stepped in here." That stung. That stung…a lot.

"Well I never asked for your fucking help!" He immediately jumped to his feet and rushed towards me. I stumbled back and found myself up against the wall. Bobby came nose to nose with me and spoke in a surprisingly soothing yet threatening tone.

"You are in no position to say that right now. You know what they do to little boys like you in prison? Huh? You think your life sucks now, you won't last for long behind bars kid and that's where you would've been heading if I wasn't there to stop you. So why don't you…shut the fuck up as I try to figure this mess out." I could barely breath with him so close and I could feel the tears that I had been holding back all night begin to trickle down my cheeks.

"What's going on here?" We both turned our heads and saw Evelyn standing in the kitchen doorway. I quickly tried my best to wipe away the tears from my face and act as if nothing was going on. Bobby simply turned his body to hide me as I frantically tried to calm myself down to prevent myself from breaking down.

"Nothing ma."

"It doesn't look like nothing."

"Ma…come on. Just trying to give Jack some brotherly love."

"Jack are you okay sweetie?" I took breath and stood up straight.

"Yeah Evelyn, I'm fine. Bobby was just giving me a hard time like he usually does." Evelyn looked between the two of us with her unnerving stare.

"Bobby may I speak with you in the kitchen."

"Of course ma. Jackie…uh…go to bed or something." With that he dragged Evelyn back into the kitchen and I ran up the stairs as fast as my legs could take me. I closed the door quietly and slid down to the carpet floor.

Fuck what have I done? I'm in so much shit! How could you do this to yourself Jack? How? I'm like fucking cancer. I destroy everything that's near me. Why did I think I could help? I should've known nothing would work out, nothing ever works out in my favor. I let the tears fall silently as I sat in my dark room.

The next thing I knew I woke up on the ground where I was sitting before. I must've fallen asleep seeing as how my neck was in pain. I heard a shuffle outside my door and glanced up at the clock. 3:30 AM. I shook the sleep away from me as I slowly opened my door. I could here movement coming from Bobby's bedroom and glanced inside.

He was packing. I could already feel the panic begin to swell inside of me. He couldn't leave…he just couldn't.

"What are you doing?" I asked my voice wavering out of fear or anxiety I wasn't quite sure.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" Bobby continued to empty his drawers as I crept inside his room.

"You're leaving?" My voice squeaked and Bobby put his finger to his mouth.

"Shhh, not so loud." I just stood there with my mouth hanging open. "Yeah…I'm leaving Jack." I was having mixed emotions, a feeling that I had never really felt before.

"No…but…but you can't."

"I have to Jack. I have to get out of town while I still can. I have to lay low for a while." I tried to think rationally to say something that would make him stay.

"If you leave now, you'll look suspicious." Bobby simply shook his head.

"You kidding? Popo's around here have the attention span of a two year old. There are enough problems in this city for them to just forget about me. I just gotta give them some time." It was then I realized something. I needed him. It was a sensation that I never really had towards someone before. Of course I had felt the need for drugs and such things but never for a single person that was for more than money or food. Inside I knew that sense of safety I had felt for the past couple of weeks would be gone as soon as Bobby left.

"You can't."

"I have to Jack." He quickly zipped his bags and put his hat on his head.

"No! You can't leave Bobby." The sense of urgency was overwhelming. I tried my best to stand in his way.

"Jack. I won't be gone for long. But I have to leave now, I might not have another chance."

"No!" I put my hands on his chest and tried to push which was really useless since he was still able to move with me pushing him.

"Jack! You are going to be fine. If you really have that much faith in this Jaime girl nothing will happen to you. Now I have to go."

"I said no."

"Jack move!" He pushed me out of the way and trudged down the stairs with bags in tow.

I ran down the stairs after him. I could barely get a word out before he opened the front door and started putting his bags in the car.

"Bobby!" I could feel the tears swell up again as the wind brushed passed me and the snowflakes began to settle in my hair.

"Go back inside Jack! You're going to freeze your ass off!" He slammed the trunk closed and opened the door to the driver's seat.

"Bobby! What if something happens and you're not here!" Bobby sighed loudly.

"I talked to both Angel and Jerry, they know what's up. If something happens they'll have your back." He was just about to close the door when I finally let it out.

"Bobby! I need you! I can't do this without you Bobby! What if something happens? I need to know that you're there!" I was shivering with tears streaming down my face as I chocked on my own breath. Bobby slowly opened the door and walked towards me.

"Jackie…" He chuckled lightly and gave me a hug which I returned. "And this whole time I thought you hated my guts."

"Well…most of the time I do." I mumbled. He then held me out at arms length and ruffled my hair. I wiped my nose and looked down at my feet.

"I didn't mean what I said earlier Jack." I gave him a questioning look. "Yeah I had a bad feeling when you got here but I also felt that way when both Jerry and Angel came over…So…I guess that means you'll fit in just fine around here." I knew I couldn't stop him. He was going to leave and there was nothing I could do about it. "Listen, I won't be gone forever. I'll be back sooner than you think and even then you're gonna wish that I had been gone longer."

"I hate you." I muttered lightly as he just smiled.

"Yeah… you were definitely supposed to be a part of this household. I have to go now Jack." I just stood there as he went back to his car and started the engine. He backed out of the driveway and rolled the window down. "Hey! Don't let Green ride your ass. He's a pussy at heart." He gave me one last nod and drove away.

**Authors Note: It seems I'm only capable of writing short chapters. Haha... so sorry. But I hope you guys still enjoyed reading it. Tell me how you feel about this chapter and tell me comments about this story in general by leaving feedback! That would totally be AWESOME! I cherish every single review so please please please! Leave feedback!**

**Thanks to all those that reviewed: irocksocks, WindStar, Ryo Wings, pwrhungryir, sadvirture, lovely, XNegAttentionX, trabeck, EbonyRose02, Rogue21493, Duchess4ever, pollypocket911, Ju, UnderworldBabe, Lala44 **


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